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insanelyXnikki

Offline (the 12/15/2014 at 9:12pm) | Search for a member

insanelyXnikki

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 25 November 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 16148
  • Number of comments : 161
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About insanelyXnikki : "Don't focus on the one guy who hates you. You don't go to the park and sit your picnic down next to the only pile of dog shit."

insanelyXnikki's page activity

Visits<b>pureportedpear</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 1:51pm<b>barkerman00</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 9:14pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 8:03pm<b>Cryptical</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 2:13pm<b>Khaleesi_26</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 5:46pm<b>2i1337i2iscore</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 6:50pm<b>PAsurvivor</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 1:35pm<b>the1pumpCHUMP</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 6:33pm<b>Red_Brooks</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 6:25am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 4:32pm<b>hurricanesTheU</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 11:09am<b>doglover100</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 7:12pm<b>purecountry119</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 11:43am<b>Garrett2818</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 12:27am<b>cohenb93</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 4:16am<b>SwimmingBassist</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 12:32am<b>grizzlybear26</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 10:39pm<b>notachinesewoman</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 1:37pm

Liked!<b>Edogg215</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 1:03am

insanelyXnikki's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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insanelyXnikki's favorite FMLs

Today, I was reciting lines for a play that I'm in. It was going great, until I realized that I was actually reciting my scripted sales pitch from my telemarketing job. FML

#20533106
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21702) - you deserved it (7126)

On 03/06/2013 at 12:44am - misc - by sales ham (man) - United States

Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend asked me, "Are you sure you're a guy?" I still have no idea what that was for. FML

#20529151
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45946) - you deserved it (5890)

On 03/03/2013 at 7:17am - intimacy - by Ihatemylife (man) - Slovenia (Bohinj)

Today, I told my mom that I heard something, and I think we have rats in the attic and should hire an exterminator. She looked at me and said, "Rats, huh? That's what the mom in The Exorcist thought, but it turned out to be the devil living up there." FML

#20528775
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30800) - you deserved it (3190)

On 03/02/2013 at 11:18pm - misc - by jkbeynon - United States (California)

Today, at my mother's funeral, as everyone was around her casket for the viewing, my 5-year-old son in cluelessness of what was going on shouted, "Grandma is more fun when she isn't sleeping." Everyone cried. FML

#20521929
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41088) - you deserved it (3405)

On 02/25/2013 at 6:00pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I gave birth to my daughter in a hospital corridor. The nurse who took me to my room afterward tried to comfort me by saying there've been worse incidents; she said that two years ago, a lady gave birth in the parking lot. That was me too. FML

#20521872
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56190) - you deserved it (4521) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/25/2013 at 2:47pm - health - by laprochainefoisjerestealamaison (woman) - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, I was pushing my wheelchair-bound grandpa back home, when a pretty girl walked past us in the opposite direction. He made me stop and turn him around, just so he could ogle her ass as she walked away. FML

#20518187
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26997) - you deserved it (4482) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/22/2013 at 9:27pm - misc - by hé merde - Sent from mobile version

Today, my wife mentioned that she wanted to give me a three-way. I was ecstatic, until she opened her right hand, only to reveal a 3-way lightbulb. FML

#20512105
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16299) - you deserved it (38511)

On 02/18/2013 at 12:23pm - intimacy - by phatdaddy62 (man) - United States

Today, my father gave me his blessing to be married on one condition: that I keep my maiden name when I marry. My fiancé thought it would be "epic". My last name will be hyphenated to Cobb-Webb. FML

#20509329
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32788) - you deserved it (5551)

On 02/16/2013 at 10:27am - love - by MsCobb - United States (Ohio)

Today, with 24 inches of snow on the ground, it is raining like hell. The weight of the snow, now full of rain water, collapsed the roof over my living room. I was eating cereal in my underwear, in the living room, directly under the failure. I'm cold. FML

#20502433
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41497) - you deserved it (3403)

On 02/11/2013 at 3:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, on my shift as a nurse, I asked a pregnant woman what she would name her child. She said she saw the name "Chlamydia" on a billboard and decided to name her daughter that, saying it was "beautiful." I informed her that it was an STD, and she replied, "Oh, well no one knows that!" FML

#20482313
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36944) - you deserved it (2413)

On 01/27/2013 at 11:36pm - kids - by andy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at my cousin's birthday party, my grandma took me to one side, slipped me a pad, and started ranting that tampons "steal your virginity" and that I should never use them. Well, okay then. FML

#20481357
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27950) - you deserved it (2138)

On 01/27/2013 at 2:08pm - misc - by dynah114 (woman) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, my husband asked me to show him my boob. I began to pull the side of my shirt down when he said, "No, not that one, the big one." FML

#20472081
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42000) - you deserved it (4284)

On 01/21/2013 at 9:27pm - intimacy - by sarah6786 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, a bull escaped from the small farm down the street. It ended up in my yard and would not let me outside. I called animal control, who said, "We only deal with regular animals." FML

#20465397
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32549) - you deserved it (2153)

On 01/17/2013 at 10:48pm - animals - by bull-stuff - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I walked into my mother's house to find that she had knitted clothes for some of the household appliances. The toaster was wearing a dress. FML

#20457945
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29656) - you deserved it (3242)

On 01/13/2013 at 10:00pm - misc - by anon - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went out for dinner with my long-term crush, who turned out to be a huge dog person. He asked me which dog breed I like the most. In an attempt to reply with both Labrador and Doberman, I accidentally said Dumbledore. FML

#20451560
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31561) - you deserved it (8909)

On 01/10/2013 at 7:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Slovakia



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