About insanelyXnikki : "Don't focus on the one guy who hates you. You don't go to the park and sit your picnic down next to the only pile of dog shit."
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
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Today, I proudly told my elitist dad that I now have a beautiful girlfriend. He didn't believe me, so I showed him her Facebook. He demanded that I stop seeing her, saying that the duck-facing in her avatar was the hallmark of "a lower form of being" who would only ever shame our family. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8199) - you deserved it (17840)
On 06/12/2012 at 7:39pm - love - by idontgetit (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, while at my cosmetics job, an elderly lady came up to me asking for a product. I told her we had a smaller size and a larger size for a better deal. She told me she wanted the smaller size because she'd "probably be dead" before she finished that one. I laughed. She was serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18002) - you deserved it (3343)
On 06/10/2012 at 4:47am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, I walked in on my roommate trying to smoke a Mars bar. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13844) - you deserved it (1486)
On 06/05/2012 at 5:03am - misc - by holyshart - United States
Today, I had so much to do, I didn't know where to start. So I didn't. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9202) - you deserved it (29289)
On 06/01/2012 at 10:29am - misc - by Anonymous - Austria (Wien)
Today, I found out that my colleagues had replaced my email auto-responder with a message saying, "I'm away for two weeks in Brazil. Due to the surgery, when I return, please address me by my new name: Crystal." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22811) - you deserved it (2309) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 05/31/2012 at 4:19pm - love - by Monsieur-Madame (man) - France (Champagne-Ardenne)
Today, I drunkenly staggered home and crashed on the couch. When I woke up I realized it wasn't my house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8296) - you deserved it (20527)
Today, my dad started his mid-life crisis. Instead of a Porsche or a Ferrari, he bought a tractor. Goodbye summer holiday. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13407) - you deserved it (1270)
On 05/31/2012 at 6:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom
Today, I almost got kidnapped. Again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25508) - you deserved it (3678)
On 05/31/2012 at 1:28am - misc - by gonavybeatarmy - United States (California)
Today, I was so broke I went to Costco, not to buy anything, but to eat their free food samples. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21558) - you deserved it (2226)
On 05/30/2012 at 9:52pm - money - by thedri11 - United States (California)
Today, I met up with my dad after having worked abroad for the past six months. Apparently, during that time he's had a mid-life crisis or been snorting a few too many turds, because he's now some sort of hippie calling himself "Memnoch of Pleiades". FML
I agree, your life sucks (13957) - you deserved it (1444)
On 05/30/2012 at 5:34pm - misc - by wtf (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)
Today, I realised that my body has its own masturbation cycle; while I was out shopping, I heard the intro music to my room-mate's favourite video game, and popped an uncontrollable boner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12973) - you deserved it (3382)
On 05/28/2012 at 2:02pm - intimacy - by Danny (man) - Ireland (Dublin)
Today, my boyfriend and I were making love. I've been working on a novel for the past six months, and what would have been mid-way through, I accidentally said the main character's name instead of my boyfriend's. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17392) - you deserved it (11723)
On 05/27/2012 at 12:06pm - intimacy - by oh lord - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I texted my friend and asked her what her sad status on Facebook was about. She texted me back saying her step-mother had passed away. I tried to reply with "awwh" but my phone autocorrected it to "ahaha." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24098) - you deserved it (4923)
On 05/27/2012 at 3:19am - misc - by iPhonekid - United States (Texas)
Today, my grandmother was driving me to the mall. Suddenly, she stopped in the middle of the road. When I asked her what exactly she was doing, she said, "Oh, am I driving?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (19524) - you deserved it (1196)
On 05/26/2012 at 9:48pm - misc - by anonymus - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I had dinner with my family for the first time in a couple of days. My mum and dad spent the majority of the time arguing whether salt or pepper weighed more. This is why I'm not home often. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12098) - you deserved it (1258)
On 05/23/2012 at 7:44am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Friday 24 May 2013
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