Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

insanelyXnikki

Offline (10 hours ago) | Search for a member

insanelyXnikki

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 25 November 1994 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 14257
  • Number of comments : 161
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About insanelyXnikki : "Don't focus on the one guy who hates you. You don't go to the park and sit your picnic down next to the only pile of dog shit."

insanelyXnikki's page activity

Visits<b>PAsurvivor</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 1:35pm<b>the1pumpCHUMP</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 6:33pm<b>Red_Brooks</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 6:25am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 4:32pm<b>hurricanesTheU</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 11:09am<b>doglover100</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 7:12pm<b>purecountry119</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 11:43am<b>Garrett2818</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 12:27am<b>cohenb93</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 4:16am<b>SwimmingBassist</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 12:32am<b>grizzlybear26</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 10:39pm<b>notachinesewoman</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 1:37pm<b>omgitsjc</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 8:25pm<b>turtlescott163</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 2:29pm<b>lunarjazz</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 3:51pm<b>kporter26</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 12:16am<b>maxyutd</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 2:08am<b>Zaketh2112</b> - the 01/07/2014 at 1:45pm

insanelyXnikki's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of insanelyXnikki's badges

insanelyXnikki's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend tried explaining a duck flying into our living room and taking a shit everywhere as "paranormal activity". FML

#20963751
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36688) - you deserved it (3257)

On 11/19/2013 at 8:09pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I watched as my grandma beat the shit out of my dad at the zoo. FML

#20948659
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44987) - you deserved it (4109)

On 11/07/2013 at 12:52am - misc - by Grandson - United States (California)

Today, my son's lemonade stand was robbed by a senior citizen. FML

#20908703
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46743) - you deserved it (2947)

On 10/05/2013 at 6:25pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, while sitting in a crowded waiting room at the doctor's office, my 5-year-old daughter pointed at my 6-year-old son's crotch and boomed, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which he yelled, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML

#20898150
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48714) - you deserved it (6370)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:00pm - kids - by SerenityJ (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I sent a student to the dean for trying to smoke pot in my class. His mother called to complain that I publicly humiliated her son. FML

Today, a street preacher got on my metro car and gave a long, loud speech about how we sinful, polluted congressional staffers must inform our bosses that choosing a homosexual lifestyle was like trading your soul for soup. We got stuck in a tunnel for thirty minutes. FML

#20887597
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36202) - you deserved it (3481)

On 09/19/2013 at 8:54am - misc - by CapitolSouthSux (woman) - United States

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

#20882561
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54885) - you deserved it (27576)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, my self-esteem sank so low that I sabotaged my workplace's corporate network, then fixed it, just so I could feel needed. FML

#20878417
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39708) - you deserved it (6427)

On 09/12/2013 at 3:40pm - work - by sysadmin:~# rm -rf / (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my workplace was having a "prices are down" promotion. I had to wear a badge that said, "Down and staying down" all day, opening myself up to a lot of weirdos winking at me or saying, "Oh yeah, I bet you are". FML

#20878038
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38782) - you deserved it (2806)

On 09/12/2013 at 3:42am - work - by hawkwardd - Australia

Today, I had a dream in which I was playing tennis. As I hit a powerful serve, I suddenly woke up due to having slapped myself in the face. FML

#20875790
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41895) - you deserved it (6151)

On 09/10/2013 at 2:44pm - misc - by Grand Slam (man) - Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant)

Today, I came home to find my housemate cowering in the lounge corner, sobbing, hugging a bag of chips while the automatic vacuum cleaner gently bumped into him. Apparently he "mistakenly" put magic mushrooms in his sandwich instead of peanut butter. FML

#20868509
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39151) - you deserved it (2906)

On 09/05/2013 at 3:45am - misc - by down trodden (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I went to my first class of the year. The first thing the teacher said was, "I hate this f*cking school." FML

#20867651
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34273) - you deserved it (2651)

On 09/04/2013 at 4:39pm - misc - by swana99 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was grounded by my dad for "popping pills like a gangbanger". I take prescription ADHD medicine and a multi-vitamin. FML

#20863675
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37385) - you deserved it (2680)

On 09/01/2013 at 9:15pm - love - by zephyrgk - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was the victim of a drive-by pissing by some drunken loon on a segway. FML

#20849456
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34909) - you deserved it (2464)

On 08/22/2013 at 3:05pm - misc - by never thought I'd say that (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, at work, I had to utter the phrase, "Sir, please stop rubbing yourself with the peas." It's exactly how it sounds. FML

#20847854
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42527) - you deserved it (2977)

On 08/21/2013 at 1:30pm - work - by twatstick (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: