insanelyXnikki

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Offline (the 06/21/2016 at 1:19pm)

insanelyXnikki

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 25 November 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 23477
  • Number of comments : 161
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About insanelyXnikki : "Don't focus on the one guy who hates you. You don't go to the park and sit your picnic down next to the only pile of dog shit."

insanelyXnikki's page activity

Visits<b>aye146</b> - yesterday at 12:05pm<b>StyrisSand</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 7:45pm<b>KeatonHanson</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 7:47pm<b>12345BKRlife</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 7:35pm<b>lpfire61</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 4:10am<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 6:23am<b>Wane8822</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 10:29am<b>minimanion</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 12:33am<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 12:06pm<b>hammonds92</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 1:57am<b>jordanwilbanks</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 11:31am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 1:49am<b>PDSot</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 8:45am<b>chr1sF</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 6:38pm<b>braver7315</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 7:10am<b>Jayroc</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 4:30am<b>marshm610</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 9:46pm<b>annoyedperson</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 7:48pm

Fucked!<b>Wane8822</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 3:33pm<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 5:48am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 7:59am<b>jordanrecatto</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 8:20pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 1:03am

insanelyXnikki's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of insanelyXnikki's badges

insanelyXnikki's favorite FMLs

Today, I was telling my sister about how I am horribly depressed and how I can't function and she responded with, "Oh, shit! I've got to go Jeopardy is on!" FML

by bobbies / 04/14/2009 at 10:15pm / United States (Iowa) / Health

Today, I took the bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway there, she fell asleep, her head on my shoulder. I gently tried to wake her up before my stop. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML

by meteorbabe0101 / 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm / United States (Michigan) / Health

Today, I was working as a manager of the local movie theater. This six year old came in with no parents or anyone else. When I asked him where his parents were he looked at me and said, "Shut up white boy, I don't have to listen to your shit." I just got told by a six year old. FML

by brad3720 / 04/13/2009 at 8:44pm / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, a woman drove through my house. She was texting and eating watermelon at the same time. I didn't know that was even possible, but now my house is condemned. FML

by Fitz / 04/12/2009 at 9:53am / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, I was sitting at my computer, listening and singing along to some music. I started singing louder, thinking that I was pretty good. Just then, my mom comes barging through the door in a frenzy saying, "Are you all right? Are you hurt?" FML

by awesome / 04/11/2009 at 1:36pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got back a paper after a peer review. I had worked really hard on it over the last week and was proud of the end result. When I got the paper back the only positive comment on the paper was "well I really like the blue staple you used to hold it together." FML

by Kim / 04/10/2009 at 3:12am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

by tool / 04/09/2009 at 2:03am / United States (Nevada) / Work

Today, my good friend who just had a baby girl sent her newborn's pictures to me via picture message. To reply, instead of writing "Awwwwww" I wrote "Ewwwwww" by mistake. FML

by nothing / 04/08/2009 at 4:42pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, I had to return a shirt to Target. My mom offered to do it for me on her way to work, so I gave her the shirt and receipt. Later, I realized that on the same receipt I had purchased condoms, lube, and whipped cream. FML

by UGH / 04/08/2009 at 4:34pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, I made the mistake of sneezing in front of a hyper religious customer, who for ten minutes blamed the incident of shifting weather patterns that signaled the return of Jesus, who was as she explained, upset about the abortion rates in America and President Obama. FML

by Anonymous / 04/08/2009 at 6:26am / United States (North Carolina) / Work

Today, a car was waiting for me to cross the street so I thought it would be funny to slowly limp across the street. When I got to the end, I jumped as high as I could to show I was faking. Turns out I tripped and hit my head hard on the sidewalk. That car took me to the hospital. FML

by funnyguyNOT / 04/05/2009 at 5:39pm / United States / Transportation

Today, I was riding my bike and stopped at a street light. A little girl looked at me, then asked her mother, "Mommy, why does that girl have a ring through her nose?" Her mother then replied, "Because her parents don't love her." FML

by Anonymous / 04/05/2009 at 3:33pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today, while working at a Subway store right next to a big hospital, there was a big line of people all getting their subs toasted. Without turning around, I asked the next person in line, "I'll bet you want yours extra toasted?" She was a burns victim from the hospital. FML

by 00Evan / 04/05/2009 at 9:48am / Australia (Queensland) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my friends were being rude to me, so I decided to be nice to a boy that didn't have many friends. While I was talking to him he popped a pimple on his face and tasted it. FML

by lalanon / 04/03/2009 at 1:16am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend was saying how her "nano" died. I quickly responded by saying, "So? Recharge it." Turns out she didn't say "nano"; she'd said "nana." FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 12:36am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous