insanelyXnikki

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Offline (the 04/30/2016 at 6:17pm)

insanelyXnikki

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 25 November 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 22781
  • Number of comments : 161
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About insanelyXnikki : "Don't focus on the one guy who hates you. You don't go to the park and sit your picnic down next to the only pile of dog shit."

insanelyXnikki's page activity

Visits<b>12345BKRlife</b> - yesterday at 7:35pm<b>StyrisSand</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 3:26pm<b>lpfire61</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 4:10am<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 6:23am<b>Wane8822</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 10:29am<b>minimanion</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 12:33am<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 12:06pm<b>hammonds92</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 1:57am<b>jordanwilbanks</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 11:31am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 1:49am<b>PDSot</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 8:45am<b>chr1sF</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 6:38pm<b>braver7315</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 7:10am<b>Jayroc</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 4:30am<b>marshm610</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 9:46pm<b>annoyedperson</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 7:48pm<b>wildnargles</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 2:51am<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 3:58pm

Fucked!<b>Wane8822</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 3:33pm<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 5:48am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 7:59am<b>jordanrecatto</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 8:20pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 1:03am

insanelyXnikki's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of insanelyXnikki's badges

insanelyXnikki's favorite FMLs

Today, when petting my friend's dog, I acted like I was going to make out with him. While I wasn't looking the dog stuck his entire tongue in my mouth. FML

by thedogkisser / 06/06/2009 at 3:44pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, I found the source of the bad smell that has been plaguing me for the past two weeks in my apartment. The police knocked on my door asking if I've seen my neighbor recently. I haven't. The smell has been that of a dead person. It's a smell that even Febreze can't remove. FML

by Michael / 06/05/2009 at 5:42pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, my fiancé of two years told me he was bored of me and he'd just prolonged the engagement to see if anyone more interesting would come along in the mean time. He was upset because no one did. FML

by Anonymous / 06/04/2009 at 10:46am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I rode my bike to the grocery store. I left my bike on the small bike rack they have outside the door. When I came out 5 minutes later I found someone had tied their enormous, growling German Shepard to the same rack. I had to wait for the owner to come out who then laughed at me. FML

by j / 06/03/2009 at 11:36pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the extremely crowded gym when someone came up behind me and shouted in my ear scaring the living shit out of me. I jump into a karate pose in front of everyone. No one was behind me. It was a new song starting on my headphones. A trainer asked me if I needed an ambulance. FML

by dearme / 06/01/2009 at 9:53pm / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, I had to give a presentation about Adolf Hitler. I wanted to point out he was a very good speaker, and could incite a crowd. Instead, what came out was 'Hitler's oral skills made everyone go wild with excitement" FML

by Cail / 06/01/2009 at 7:12pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I called the number a guy had given me at a bar last night. I got the Soulja Boy Hotline. Now every few hours I get messages on my phone like 'Good morning! Jump on up and get yo swag on, this is Soulja Boy!' and I can't seem to get it to stop. FML

by rain / 05/31/2009 at 10:05pm / United States (West Virginia) / Love

Today, I went to put my laptop on a desk when I got a text message. I was startled by my ringtone and dropped my laptop on the ground. It now has dent marks on the bottom. The text message was from an annoying friend simply saying "I'm eating a hot dog." FML

by Anonymous / 05/31/2009 at 6:09pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was watching Harry Potter. When all the students at Hogwarts started to clap at one point, I started clapping myself. FML

by whoahshloann / 05/30/2009 at 7:48pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking calls at the helpdesk I work at. The caller was a man, and while helping him with his issue he suddenly stopped to tell me I had a nice soothing voice. Then he told me to say something else. As I continued to help him, he started making moaning noises. I'm a guy. FML

by Anonymous / 05/28/2009 at 12:52pm / United States (Virginia) / Work

Today, my wife and I watched a documentary film about a kid living with severe asthma. In one scene, the kid has a severe asthma attack, and is rushed to hospital. My wife started laughing hysterically at this and after apologising, goes "it's just he sounded exactly like you in bed." FML

by Weezylover / 05/26/2009 at 4:24am / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Intimacy

Today, I was preparing a dinner for some business associates, in hopes of closing the deal on a promotion. I emailed them with the menu, in case there were any allergies. Hours later, I checked the email again to find that instead of serving the Roast Duck I would be serving the Roast Fuck. FML

by wordmalfunction / 05/25/2009 at 5:42pm / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was writing a huge paper for a class as our last grade. My dog starts scratching himself. He hit the power button on the computer. Nothing was saved. FML

by duderboi99 / 05/25/2009 at 3:45pm / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, I decided to use my mentor's advice. I told her I had been having some trouble controlling my anger, she told me to throw rocks at trees. I threw a rock at a tree, very hard. It bounced back hit me above the eye. I'm still pissed as shit. FML

by untitledentity / 05/24/2009 at 12:03pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad told me about how my mother had a bad dream last night and began to scream "Don't take me, take my children!" FML

by lm / 05/20/2009 at 4:49pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous