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insane_chick

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insane_chick
  • Town/Country : Highlands, TX, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 24 October 1990 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 10403
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About insane_chick : I'm a math/art dork. I'm an aerospace engineer/mathematician in training... enough said. I'm a retarded genius, lack social skills, and hide from life in my studies, because life is fucked.

In case you get bored of FML Check out my art gallery at:
http://insane-chick.deviantart.com/
My Twitter is: calliecparrish

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insane_chick's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a fast-food joint and ordered off of the $1.00 menu to save money. Five hours later I go to the hospital with food-poisoning. After a whole day of not eating, crapping, puking, having tests, and an bunch of IV fluids, my $1.00 burger ended up costing me $2,000 in bills. Really. FML

#1547778 (404)

I agree, your life sucks (111604) - you deserved it (13900)

On 05/02/2009 at 12:56am - health - by Sick (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to the doctor for a checkup. The doctor went through the normal questions, then paused for a moment and jotted something down. Later when I got back my report from the checkup, I noticed that the doctor had checked the "no" box by "sexually active." She didn't even ask me that. FML

#1536104 (127)

I agree, your life sucks (66481) - you deserved it (4183)

On 05/01/2009 at 8:05pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I did my laundry in my dorm. After dragging 2 hampers down 4 flights of stairs, my ID card with money on it was rejected. After dragging it back upstairs, I scrounged up enough quarters from friends. 30 minutes after finally starting my laundry, I realized I forgot to add detergent. FML

#1530286 (52)

I agree, your life sucks (18344) - you deserved it (33352)

On 05/01/2009 at 5:15pm - health - by CollegeGirl (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my girlfriend's mother called her in the bedroom for a serious talk. I overheard them arguing and yelling at each other. It turns out her mother found a condom next to her garbage. We got caught because her cat swallowed the condom and threw it up. FML

#1520851 (116)

I agree, your life sucks (46545) - you deserved it (13808)

On 05/01/2009 at 10:28am - intimacy - by badluckdrew (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I heard my mom ask "Are you okay?" I opened my mouth to tell her about how I've been feeling suicidal lately. At that second, I realized she was talking to my cat. FML

#1399688 (178)

I agree, your life sucks (50037) - you deserved it (4368)

On 04/27/2009 at 5:50pm - animals - by Tragic (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was home alone while my mom went out to dinner. I decided to hop in the shower, and I noticed my mom left her douche in there. After, I texted her telling her what I found and that it was gross. Her response? "It's not gross. It came from my vagina, like you and your sister." FML

#1040917 (185)

I agree, your life sucks (38598) - you deserved it (16281)

On 04/16/2009 at 11:08pm - health - by duuuuude (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I made an appointment with a therapist because lately I've been feeling alone and like no one cares about me. I waited at her office for about forty minutes before the receptionist informed me that she must have forgotten about the appointment. I was stood up by even my therapist. FML

#971564 (133)

I agree, your life sucks (71609) - you deserved it (3936)

On 04/14/2009 at 2:41pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was playing with my pet hamster and I decided to put it down my pants for fun. It started running around and I actually got aroused. My mom then walked into my room to see me with an erection and my pet hamster poking his head out of the hole in my boxers. FML

#878433 (735)

I agree, your life sucks (29248) - you deserved it (210134)

On 04/08/2009 at 10:14pm - intimacy - by hammylove (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got an email from a professor saying he was going to fail me for missing the alloted absences, which is school policy. I pointed out I was in the hospital for two weeks with a life threatening illness and that he even came to visit me. He told me "rules are rules." FML

#657001 (136)

I agree, your life sucks (94854) - you deserved it (3002)

On 03/28/2009 at 2:35am - health - by hospitalflunky (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I gave a campus tour to a group of high school seniors. As I was showing off the dorms, one student asks, "Are these beds sturdy enough for threesomes?" Before I could respond, another kid shouts, "How would he know, I bet the only action he gets in bed is from his left hand." She's correct. FML

#553783 (141)

I agree, your life sucks (77744) - you deserved it (7207)

On 03/23/2009 at 2:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, it was my final meeting with my psychologist who was helping me with my bipolar disorder. I just found out that he committed suicide. FML

#225762 (143)

I agree, your life sucks (89543) - you deserved it (3387)

On 03/06/2009 at 12:11pm - health - by drakx88 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I asked my girlfriend when she would give me a blowjob. She replied, "you know that won't happen, I'm a vegetarian." FML

#195442 (240)

I agree, your life sucks (54150) - you deserved it (23596)

On 03/03/2009 at 1:29pm - intimacy - by Sal (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I told my mom I loved her and she asked if I was going to kill myself. FML

#18155 (33)

I agree, your life sucks (29616) - you deserved it (2044)

On 02/09/2009 at 7:11pm - misc - by TGIkaty - United States (California)

Today, I saw a homeless man asking for money for food. Not wanting to give him money so he'd spend it on booze, I decided to buy him a full big mac meal from McDonalds. When I went to hand it to him, he quickly waved his hand, denying it saying, "Thanks but I'm a vegetarian". FML

#2596 (88)

I agree, your life sucks (13984) - you deserved it (3032)

On 01/25/2009 at 10:44pm - misc - by Michelle C - United States (California)