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Today I finally finished my art project which was worth 50% of my quarterly grade. I came in 1st period to give it to her. When she turned to look at it, her elbow hit her coffee and spilled it all over the canvas. I got a 60. She said I would have had a 100, except for the giant coffee stain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34671) - you totally deserved it (1426)
On 11/05/2009 at 5:14pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, my boss came to my cubicle to give me my annual performance bonus. I was asleep at my desk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5748) - you totally deserved it (34699)
On 07/10/2009 at 5:21pm - misc - by ChrisC (man) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I was at the beach and I met a surfer with scars all over his back. Trying to make conversation, I asked "So how'd you get those cool scars? Coral?" To which he replied "Horrific childhood abuse, actually. But yeah, they're pretty cool." FML
I agree, your life sucks (39126) - you totally deserved it (17719)
On 07/09/2009 at 10:08am - love - by Anon (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was holding a yard sale. A man came up to me and asked if he could buy a pair of red and white sneakers that I'd found in my attic and had never worn. Five bucks later, he was walking away with what I now realize was the pair of shoes signed by Michael Jordan given to me by my uncle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7324) - you totally deserved it (42780)
On 07/03/2009 at 2:30pm - misc - by capcha (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I took a bike ride to enjoy the weather and stopped for a break on the sidewalk of an overpass, taking in the view of the beautiful hills. I was approached by a cop, who said to me: "Ma'am, I know your life is crap right now, but I'm sure it'll get better. Please don't jump." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34434) - you totally deserved it (2498)
On 07/01/2009 at 1:41pm - misc - by Liz (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I found out my girlfriend is pregnant and then decided to break up with her. Why? We're lesbians. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62778) - you totally deserved it (6048)
On 06/30/2009 at 1:32am - love - by yoyoyo (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I took chocolax to help lose some weight before I left for Miami. Turns out it doesn't happen right away like in the movies, it happens six hours later in front of your girlfriends parents, that you've just met for the first time at a very upperclass restaurant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7713) - you totally deserved it (32829)
On 06/30/2009 at 1:14am - health - by POLYBLOT (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my brother and I were going to give our parents their anniversary gift which cost us over $3000. The gift was a trip to London in August to see a show on Michael Jackson's comeback tour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (60117) - you totally deserved it (3882)
On 06/26/2009 at 10:31am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5791) - you totally deserved it (161474)
On 06/11/2009 at 12:06pm - misc - by I_Am_The_Edge (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was driving on the motorway when a cop car made me stop. It was a routine check and when they said "Have you been drinking?" of course I said no. To that, my 6 year old sitting in the back screamed "Yes he did! He's lying I saw him drink!" I had drunk a milkshake. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55668) - you totally deserved it (2293)
On 06/04/2009 at 8:17am - kids - by Kimmiko (woman) - Germany (Niedersachsen)
Today, a man in my town was arrested for hiding methanphetamine in a hollowed out walking cane and distributing it to the population of his retirement complex. That man was my 58 year old father. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52346) - you totally deserved it (1391)
On 03/10/2009 at 11:01am - misc - by Noname (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, my white mother in law called our house phone. Since I'm Chilean and have a fairly heavy accent, she mistook me for the cleaning lady and scolded me for answering the phone. Before I could correct her, she said "this is why only white people should be allowed in America" and hung up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (96257) - you totally deserved it (3424)
On 03/09/2009 at 5:14pm - misc - by bunnierabbbit - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was sitting in a restaurant with my best friend. We had just competed in a pageant together earlier this month. A lady comes up to my friend who got first alternate and said,"You were robbed of that title. You deserved to win. I hated the winner." I was the winner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35722) - you totally deserved it (3329)
On 03/09/2009 at 12:16am - misc - by frosho (woman) - United States (Mississippi)
Today, in art class we finally had the critique for the self portraits we've been working on for a month. We critique a few and come to mine. Everyone is silent. Finally, one girl says "I'm just going to be blunt. It doesn't look like you. You're not that pretty." Everyone nods. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44273) - you totally deserved it (3002)
On 02/25/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by mylifeeee - United States (Virginia)
Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up!". FML
I agree, your life sucks (43044) - you totally deserved it (9746)
On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)
