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immja

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immja
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2742
  • Number of comments : 61
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Today, I woke up from a dream in which I had a penis. Apparently I talk in my sleep, because my boyfriend kept staring at my crotch. FML

#12915850
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25966) - you deserved it (4202)

On 09/05/2010 at 10:20am - intimacy - by urgg (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up from a dream in which I had a penis. Apparently I talk in my sleep, because my boyfriend kept staring at my crotch. FML

#12915850
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25966) - you deserved it (4202)

On 09/05/2010 at 10:20am - intimacy - by urgg (woman) - United States

Today, my mom told me I was conceived on Halloween. She thought it would be funny to say "Let's just say your dad was not wearing his ghost costume." She then winked. I am now scarred for life. FML

#12874867
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21700) - you deserved it (3524)

On 09/02/2010 at 8:29pm - intimacy - by anonymous.. (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I walked in on my mom's boyfriend jacking off. The worst part was that he didn't stop. FML

#12849732
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33752) - you deserved it (3617)

On 09/01/2010 at 2:16am - intimacy - by Jill Shanks - United States

Today, my boyfriend questioned why I always put my shirts in the dryer right before wearing them. I told him it was because the dryer causes my shirts to regain their form and tightness. His response: "You should throw your vagina in there along with them." FML

#12822018
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37608) - you deserved it (14404)

On 08/30/2010 at 1:51pm - intimacy - by FYouBoyfriend (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend questioned why I always put my shirts in the dryer right before wearing them. I told him it was because the dryer causes my shirts to regain their form and tightness. His response: "You should throw your vagina in there along with them." FML

#12822018
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37608) - you deserved it (14404)

On 08/30/2010 at 1:51pm - intimacy - by FYouBoyfriend (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, it was really hot in my house so I pulled my shorts down so I was just in my boxers. My family and I were watching tv and I got a spontaneous erection. When I discreetly tried to pull my shorts back up, my penis flipped out of my boxers. FML

#12792346
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33028) - you deserved it (22086)

On 08/28/2010 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Sicko - Sent from mobile version

Today, it was really hot in my house so I pulled my shorts down so I was just in my boxers. My family and I were watching tv and I got a spontaneous erection. When I discreetly tried to pull my shorts back up, my penis flipped out of my boxers. FML

#12792346
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33028) - you deserved it (22086)

On 08/28/2010 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Sicko - Sent from mobile version

Today, I decided to wear string panties. While in line at the mall, they became untied. I was wearing a skirt. FML

#12781216
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11769) - you deserved it (31381)

On 08/28/2010 at 12:54am - misc - by wearingshorts - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend started to kiss my boobs. I am pregnant and started my lactation period. Now every time he looks at me he calls me milky way. FML

#12674562
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24587) - you deserved it (4055)

On 08/22/2010 at 12:26am - intimacy - by ananomus - United States (Ohio)

Today, I called my boyfriend to tell him how sweetly the main character on my favorite tv show proposed to his girlfriend. He told me to hang on a second, and later forgot about me while he told his brother about the hot blonde he slept with last night. FML

#12673402
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36539) - you deserved it (5582)

On 08/21/2010 at 11:32pm - intimacy - by jessiegirl - United States (Illinois)

Today, I took my brother and nieces to the zoo. Two of the lions at the exhibit were mating, so I said, "They're playing leap-frog." My 4-year-old niece said, "Looks like they're fucking to me." FML

#12663575
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44031) - you deserved it (14244)

On 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm - intimacy - by mc_dreamy - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, a wasp stung my nipple. Twice. The swelling makes it look like I'm growing a third breast. FML

#12539128
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24516) - you deserved it (3482)

On 08/15/2010 at 1:24pm - animals - by tammy - Sent from mobile version

Today, I discovered that my mom is having an affair... with her cousin. FML

#12322753
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50907) - you deserved it (3657)

On 08/05/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by Drew - United States (Texas)

Today, I got married. During the reception my husband got drunk and told 200+ people that we met at a dingy bar and that we "totally banged" all night. I don't know what's worse, the fact he embarrassed me in front of everyone I know, or if it was that that was not how we met. Not even close. FML

#12231460
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33185) - you deserved it (3172)

On 07/31/2010 at 7:31pm - intimacy - by wtf (woman) - United States (Idaho)



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