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ilyalwaysxoxo

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ilyalwaysxoxo
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  • Number of visits : 205
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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ilyalwaysxoxo's favorite FMLs

Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML

#3146320
455 comments

I agree, your life sucks (182142) - you deserved it (25549)

On 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm - kids - by ....... (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML

#2799622
1236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39355) - you deserved it (579886)

On 06/11/2009 at 12:06pm - misc - by I_Am_The_Edge (man) - United States (California)

Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML

#481631
446 comments

I agree, your life sucks (314386) - you deserved it (41290)

On 03/20/2009 at 12:15am - kids - by ScoobieDoo (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I texted my college boyfriend to tell him how terrible I felt about cheating. He replied saying he was so relieved because he had been cheating on me with a girl in his dorm. I was talking about my math exam. FML

#379076
313 comments

I agree, your life sucks (446143) - you deserved it (72704)

On 03/16/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by gentileman (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
484 comments

I agree, your life sucks (183026) - you deserved it (61945)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, I texted my boyfriend saying "Hi." His response: "I got your best friend pregnant". FML

#14097
430 comments

I agree, your life sucks (494357) - you deserved it (44160)

On 02/07/2009 at 10:08pm - misc - by bittersweet - United States (New York)



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