About iluvevil01 : Hi person I don't know! Why you are reading this beats me. I'm on the phone app so I don't get messages. I'm pretty crazy and have been recently given the title "queen of weird" BOW DOWN BEFORE YOUR LEADER!!!!!!!!!!! >:3
A new Thumb
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, I played a game with my boyfriend. The point of the game is to write down everything you like about someone. I put down at least ten things for him. He had one thing down for me: my boobs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16957) - you deserved it (3869)
On 04/15/2012 at 12:24am - intimacy - by Were do we go... - United States
Today, I was at the grocery store, waiting in line to pay. A man jumped me from behind, and my first reflex was to brutally elbow him in the face. I soon discovered my attacker was one of the patients at the disability house at which I work, and he was trying to hug me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21788) - you deserved it (4521)
On 04/10/2012 at 3:26pm - work - by rescuetheduck (woman) - Finland (Eastern Finland)
Today, I was cleaning the windows at work and a guy walked in so I opened the door for him. After I opened the door, he stood there with his eyes closed and his arms open. I thought he wanted a hug so I hugged him. Apparently he wanted me to spray him with Windex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15598) - you deserved it (2005)
On 04/05/2012 at 12:13am - work - by Kait - United States
Today, I brought a girl home. My dad's first reaction was to pull out the camera and snap away. She now won't reply to my texts or calls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15882) - you deserved it (1297)
On 03/30/2012 at 1:00am - misc - by jasonnn (man) - Australia
Today, I found out that sex in the woods is amazing. I also found that the roar of a nearby bear will end the amazement. Not only was I cock blocked by a bear, I almost shit myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19654) - you deserved it (4384)
On 03/21/2012 at 11:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I told my daughter that she should put some love into her cooking. She started kissing the ingredients. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14127) - you deserved it (10529)
On 03/19/2012 at 12:59am - kids - by FoodyFood (woman) - Australia (South Australia)
Today, I found out I've miserably failed a college exam. My friend had agreed to pass me answers if I needed them, since I've hardly studied this year. We were on the phone when she said, "Oh, those answers were bullshit. Serves you right, huh?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (5549) - you deserved it (46688)
On 03/10/2012 at 5:48pm - misc - by Alison (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my girlfriend was complaining of being stressed, so I mentioned having heard that sex relieves a lot of that build up of stress. She replied, "I think I'd rather stay stressed." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20789) - you deserved it (5219)
On 03/07/2012 at 10:42am - intimacy - by RZ (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was having sex with my husband. We thought the house was empty so we didn't mind being loud. Apparently, my grandma thought it would be fun to give us a surprise visit. All I found was a note on the counter from her and the spare key saying "Next time, I'll call." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22404) - you deserved it (2800)
On 02/26/2012 at 7:02pm - intimacy - by . - United States (California)
Today, I was showing off my sexy new lingerie set to my boyfriend. While we were getting frisky, he got really into things and ripped it completely off my body, destroying it. It cost me $110. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20167) - you deserved it (14971)
On 02/18/2012 at 7:29pm - intimacy - by Lilah - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was so broke and hungry that I went to Olive Garden and faked being stood up, just so I could eat their breadsticks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29974) - you deserved it (4911)
On 02/17/2012 at 4:10pm - misc - by 97 (woman) - United States
Today, a stranger told me how proud he was that my boyfriend and I were so open with our sexuality. For the past three years, most strangers have thought we are a pair of gay men. I am a woman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24764) - you deserved it (5283)
On 02/02/2012 at 1:29pm - love - by Mrs. Man (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, I was greeting customers at work. After saying good morning to one man, he stopped and looked at me from head to toe before smirking and saying, "Mmmm." He then turned around and said, "It's starting." It's only my first day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15209) - you deserved it (1568)
On 01/25/2012 at 11:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I played Call Of Duty online against someone who turned out to be wanking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17622) - you deserved it (5027)
On 01/24/2012 at 5:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, a kid from school came to my house. He asked my dad if I was at home, because we were "planning a bit of the old, you know..." and made an obscene gesture. Now I'm grounded for a month, and no matter what I say, my dad won't believe that I've never even spoken to the kid before. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19813) - you deserved it (1288)
On 01/20/2012 at 8:21pm - misc - by shellski (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
