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iluvevil01

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iluvevil01
  • Town/Country : just north of Normal, weirdania
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 12 February 1998 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 3418
  • Number of comments : 58
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About iluvevil01 : Hi person I don't know! Why you are reading this beats me. I'm on the phone app so I don't get messages. I'm pretty crazy and have been recently given the title "queen of weird" BOW DOWN BEFORE YOUR LEADER!!!!!!!!!!! >:3

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iluvevil01's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

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iluvevil01's favorite FMLs

Today, my dog did something I had no idea he could do. He participated in an all-male three-way at the dog park. In front of everyone. FML

#20199452
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20862) - you deserved it (2172)

On 12/10/2012 at 7:04pm - animals - by MoreActionThanMe - United States

Today, I stepped on the scale and realized that I weigh more than the amount of money that I have in my bank account. FML

#20199403
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22206) - you deserved it (6797)

On 12/10/2012 at 6:32pm - money - by ihncredible - United States (Michigan)

Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time; he asked me to explain my interest in dating her. In a mix of me trying to say "I want to be with your daughter" and "I want to be in your daughter's life" I got confused and said, "I want to be in your daughter." FML

#20198676
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29587) - you deserved it (5897)

On 12/10/2012 at 2:21am - love - by Tonguetied0496 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I came home to find all of the wood in my house either broken or gone. On the now legless table there was a note from my mother, saying that she needed the wood to build a boat, and that I will thank her when the world ends. FML

#20197527
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23799) - you deserved it (1326)

On 12/09/2012 at 10:29am - misc - by woodless (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend of 4 years drunkenly introduced me to another very special lady. His wife. FML

#20197502
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31654) - you deserved it (3126)

On 12/09/2012 at 9:53am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, feeling very distant to my daughter recently, I decided to sneak a peek in her diary to see what was on her mind. The book was apparently one of those that play the sound of a woman screaming when opened improperly, and alerted everyone in the house to my actions. FML

#20196447
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4815) - you deserved it (52479)

On 12/08/2012 at 2:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, it's my birthday and my ex husband texted me at midnight to tell happy birthday. Too bad he couldn't have texted my new husband to remind him. FML

#20196242
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25475) - you deserved it (4651)

On 12/08/2012 at 11:12am - love - by aerythia - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my friend and I told each other about our boyfriends. They're both nice, kind, beautiful, talented, funny, sweet and smart. They also both have the same name. And house. And job. And car. FML

#20196037
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34997) - you deserved it (1992)

On 12/08/2012 at 5:44am - love - by ouch. - Canada (Yukon Territory)

Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks, so I danced alone while I waited. Some girl with hideous meth mouth, who was clearly tripping balls, started harassing and groping me, and got all three of us kicked out when my girlfriend returned and beat the hell out of her. FML

#20195284
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20035) - you deserved it (2410)

On 12/07/2012 at 4:28pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my mom bitched me out and threatened to send me to a Bible camp, after catching me admiring a photo of a bikini model, which is apparently "immoral behavior." This is the same woman who cheated on my dad twice, justifying it by claiming the devil tempted her. FML

#20195064
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32352) - you deserved it (1741)

On 12/07/2012 at 12:06pm - misc - by sonofahypocriticalwhore (man) - United States

Today, my daughter finally gave birth to twin boys. She informed me that she named them Peregrin Took and Meriadoc Brandybuck. My grandsons are named after Hobbits. FML

#20194616
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24738) - you deserved it (4858)

On 12/06/2012 at 11:49pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, one of my work colleagues was staring at my severe sunburn. She wanted to know if she could "peel" me, when my sunburn becomes "ripe", because she loves the sound. She won't take no for an answer, and I work with her everyday this week. FML

#20194217
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17653) - you deserved it (1304)

On 12/06/2012 at 7:19pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was visiting my daughter, whose husband was still asleep at noon. I made a point of stomping around on the hardwood floor and speaking loudly to wake his lazy ass up. Turns out he's now working a 14-hour graveyard shift, and it has no negative effect on his shoe-throwing skills. FML

#20193830
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4387) - you deserved it (68595)

On 12/06/2012 at 2:23pm - misc - by mom (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, I found out my new girlfriend is a screamer. This would normally turn me on, except she sounds like she's being murdered with a rusty fork. FML

#20193609
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25686) - you deserved it (2459)

On 12/06/2012 at 9:24am - intimacy - by Dontwaketheneighbors (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got punched in the face after a stranger asked for a light, didn't realize it was a butane lighter and burnt the tip of his nose lighting his cigarette. Now my nose looks worse than his. FML

#20193519
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15829) - you deserved it (2664)

On 12/06/2012 at 6:30am - misc - by chinousmc - United States (Florida)



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