About iluvevil01 : Hi person I don't know! Why you are reading this beats me. I'm on the phone app so I don't get messages. I'm pretty crazy and have been recently given the title "queen of weird" BOW DOWN BEFORE YOUR LEADER!!!!!!!!!!! >:3
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You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, I walked in on my husband making out with his accountant, the same woman who comforted me when he cheated on me the year before. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23230) - you deserved it (6150)
On 05/20/2013 at 4:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my fiancé and I were planning to move to a cheaper apartment which my mother agreed to rent us. She was very supportive and excited that we'd be closer, and it was great until she gave us a list of books, movies, games, etc. that we can't bring because they're "demonic". FML
I agree, your life sucks (19999) - you deserved it (2300)
On 05/20/2013 at 12:25pm - misc - by ElhonnaDS (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was going on a blind date with a girl. She walked up to the table, said "Nah, no thanks" and left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24508) - you deserved it (1888)
On 05/20/2013 at 12:02pm - misc - by well okay then - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I listened to my elderly bachelor neighbor moan, "Oh, kitty, kitty, kitty! Oh kitty!" for over half-an-hour before he wandered out on his balcony in wet, tight white underwear to water his plant. This is the fifth time this week, and I still don't know what on earth he's doing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23944) - you deserved it (1702)
On 05/20/2013 at 11:56am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I berated my five-year-old nephew for peeing on the floor. His mom bitched me out for expecting "a little boy to have perfect aim." That's funny, it looked pretty good when he dropped his pants, looked me in the eyes, and started to piss on my rug. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27206) - you deserved it (1678)
On 05/20/2013 at 7:57am - kids - by AuntPeePee - United States
Today, I went for a walk. When it started pouring, I ran under the nearest tree for protection. It didn't occur to me that it might look suspicious hiding under a stranger's tree in a black hoodie, until the cops showed up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27097) - you deserved it (3796)
On 05/19/2013 at 7:07pm - misc - by black hoodie - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time. I was really excited to introduce her to my parents, until we found my mother waving around a wooden sword, and my father trying to shove my sister into the dryer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34212) - you deserved it (3529)
On 05/18/2013 at 4:06pm - love - by Mr_poole (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my girlfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time when her mother unexpectedly came home. In the rush to get dressed, we accidentally put on each other's shirts. Her mom noticed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33798) - you deserved it (12838)
On 05/18/2013 at 8:54am - intimacy - by lez probs - United States
Today, my bag got stolen with all of my belongings at the beach. After being forced to ask strangers for money, I then travelled home on the train for an hour, wearing only a bikini. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39570) - you deserved it (4044)
On 05/18/2013 at 4:57am - misc - by Chelsea - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I went to a local Indian takeaway, since I'm from India originally, and none of my friends speak Hindi. I went up to the counter and placed my order in Hindi with the seemingly Indian owner. He gave me a weird look and said, "Huh? Speak English, ya rimjob." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34559) - you deserved it (9460)
On 05/17/2013 at 4:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I tried on a new perfume. When my boyfriend hugged me, he commented that I smelled like his mom. I don't know who was more surprised by the simultaneous bulge in his pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39489) - you deserved it (3079)
On 05/17/2013 at 3:21am - intimacy - by Uncomfortable (woman) -
Today, I got a mosquito bite on my chest. Due to a severe allergic reaction it has swollen my left breast a cup size. The first thing my boyfriend said was, "Hey look! I can finally see one of them." FML
I agree, your life sucks (39920) - you deserved it (3695)
On 05/16/2013 at 5:36pm - intimacy - by Urgghh (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I had to listen to yet another delusional fuckface at school bitch about how a girl he's interested in put him in the "friend-zone". I really couldn't focus on my work, so I tried to shut him up by saying he's an idiot, not least because she already has a boyfriend. I now have a black eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29401) - you deserved it (13573)
On 05/16/2013 at 4:31pm - health - by getafucktoysomewhereelsedude (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I walked in on my sister masturbating with my curling iron. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50466) - you deserved it (3961)
On 05/16/2013 at 3:49pm - intimacy - by need € for new iron (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)
Today, I walked in on my sister masturbating with my curling iron. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50466) - you deserved it (3961)
On 05/16/2013 at 3:49pm - intimacy - by need € for new iron (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)
Monday 20 May 2013
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