Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Offline (the 09/18/2014 at 8:35pm) | Search for a member
About ilpapagrande : Not here to make friends, I just like reading opinionated remarks from people who assume they know stuff. If I visited your profile, it means you wrote something stupid/funny. Don't take it personally, cause I don't. I use mobile app so might never see your message and will definitely miss your ignorant self-righteous rant. Someday I might, don't give up! Now that we're done with the pleasantries what are you still doing here? Are you too stupid to be offended or are you amused as a result of being too stupid? And here you are, still reading right after I just insulted you! Shoo, go away, this is not an attempt to feed your sick masochistic self hatred. Go on now, bye!
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Today, a drunk dude walked up to me and said, "You're ugly as fuck." His sober friend quickly apologized and explained that he was wasted, before looking me up and down and adding "Well, not completely, I guess." FML
Today, I got the bill for the flowers my husband arranged to be delivered to me while he's out of town next week. I also got the bill for the flowers he's sending to the floozy he'll be seeing next week while he's out of town. The gift tag for it was: "I can't wait to see you." FML
Tuesday 3 March 2015