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ilm350

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ilm350
  • Town/Country : earth, planet
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 February 1995 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 2847
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About ilm350 : FML makes me laugh and creeps me out sometimes :D oh and I love music!!

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I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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ilm350's favorite FMLs

Today, I received a phone call from my son's school. Apparently, for the past week he has been telling everyone "mummy works as a drug dealer." I'm a pharmacist. FML

Today, while at work at a maternity and baby clothes store, I was supposed to send out an email about our "Beat the Clock" sale. After it was sent to over 500 people, I realized that I'd misspelled the subject line. It read, "Beat the Cock Sale." FML

#7336635
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9994) - you deserved it (25193)

On 01/14/2010 at 10:55am - work - by Oops (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I picked the treadmill next to an old man so I could feel better about myself. He ran faster and longer than I did. FML

#7164815
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5247) - you deserved it (22025)

On 01/05/2010 at 3:16pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend who I love very deeply dumped me two times, over the phone. The first time was to dump me. She then called me back a couple hours later explicitly to dump our friendship. I was just friend dumped. FML

#6823589
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27746) - you deserved it (2398)

On 12/19/2009 at 2:48am - love - by musicyman55 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I stepped out of a bar in order to make a phone call. While I was outside, the bouncers arrived and ropes were put up. They wouldn't let me back in, claiming I was too young and they hadn't seen me come out. I was celebrating my 26th birthday, the legal drinking age is 18. I also have a beard. FML

#6697068
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24237) - you deserved it (2532)

On 12/10/2009 at 6:05pm - misc - by BabyBeardy - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my ceiling fan was rocking violently so I turned it off. I stood under it trying to figure out what the problem is, it fell on my face. FML

#6512004
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29662) - you deserved it (11099)

On 11/29/2009 at 11:57am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I got no happy birthday wishes from anyone. I decided to call my sister to see if she'd remembered. My 6-year-old niece answered, so I told her it was my birthday. She said that it's tomorrow. After ten minutes of arguing with a 6-year-old, I checked the calendar. It's tomorrow. FML

#6476260
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5981) - you deserved it (49562)

On 11/27/2009 at 9:26am - misc - by forgotmyownbirthday (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my car crashed and the only refuge was at a nearby house, the resident of which was a crazy psycho. Now replace "crazy psycho" with "crazy ex-girlfriend who won't help you unless you compose a poem about how much you love her." FML

#6420890
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26813) - you deserved it (4173)

On 11/23/2009 at 11:40am - love - by worsethanzombies (man) - Spain (Madrid)

Today, I went on blind date with a guy because both our moms thought we'd like eachother. Things were going really well until I got up to go to the bathroom and he says: "My mom was right, you do have perfect breedin' hips!" FML

#6255110
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33123) - you deserved it (3387)

On 11/11/2009 at 7:21am - love - by Starchyld (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom drove me to football practice. On the way she told me that she thought I was gay and that my friend was my lover. After 15 agonizing minutes of this, we get to my practice only to be greeted by my shirtless friend wearing a pink bandana saying "Man, you hit me hard last night." FML

#4421825
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69228) - you deserved it (5944)

On 08/10/2009 at 3:10am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was having breakfast when my mom's boyfriend came and sat right across from me. He didn't try and hide the fact that he was staring at my chest and told me, "Wow, you're getting bigger." I glared at him. He winked at me. FML

#4382309
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58621) - you deserved it (3311)

On 08/08/2009 at 9:42am - misc - by oshitdonotwant (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was at the doctors getting a pap smear and she asked if it was alright if a doctor in training could come in to observe. I was already laying on the table with my feet in the stirups so everything was in plain sight. When the man came in to observe I looked up to see my brother in law. FML

#4161962
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44218) - you deserved it (2220)

On 07/30/2009 at 1:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I decided to take a nap while babysitting my neighbors kids for the day. I was woken up by this obnoxious sound, only to find the youngest kid holding scissors in one hand, a pony tail of hair in his shorts jumping around like a horse, oh, and a bald spot on the back of my head. FML

#3620845
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16121) - you deserved it (48557)

On 07/09/2009 at 8:19pm - kids - by armybrat - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to see my grandmother. She has alzheimers and doesn't remember me sometimes, and today she thought I was her sister and that I was trying to steal my grandfather from her. She hit me with a cane and called me a slut. FML

#3603925
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48148) - you deserved it (2079)

On 07/09/2009 at 3:29am - misc - by lady_jeni - United States (California)

Today, I finally got into a yoga class with the instructor I've been crushing on for 2 years. As he walked closer to greet me, I lifted my leg over my head into a full split, and queefed obnoxiously loud. He responded with his gag reflex. FML

#3241027
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41987) - you deserved it (25193)

On 06/26/2009 at 12:51pm - misc - by LondonKitsch (woman) - United States



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