iiDangerCloseBK

Search for a member

iiDangerCloseBK

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 22 February 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 922
  • Number of comments : 48
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

iiDangerCloseBK's page activity

Visits<b>YTfangirl</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 1:27pm<b>unknownother</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 10:12pm<b>AngryRussianGuy</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 5:10pm<b>Drag0nb0rn</b> - the 11/22/2013 at 5:34pm<b>Brandonep2013</b> - the 06/03/2013 at 11:29pm<b>GRgoldfish</b> - the 06/03/2013 at 10:53am<b>neeni88</b> - the 06/03/2013 at 4:17am<b>thisguy22</b> - the 06/03/2013 at 2:48am<b>dead_insects</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 9:31pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 9:14pm<b>BU2012</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 8:20pm<b>life_sucks225</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 8:03pm<b>JustinLaughs</b> - the 12/26/2012 at 5:35am<b>DarkOtaku</b> - the 12/25/2012 at 8:11pm<b>perdix</b> - the 11/17/2011 at 8:25am

iiDangerCloseBK's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of iiDangerCloseBK's badges

iiDangerCloseBK's favorite FMLs

Today, I witnessed a large woman pee on a pregnancy test in the middle of a Walmart parking lot, clean herself off, then wander around with the test hanging out of her mouth, waiting for her result. Where in the name of Christ do these people come from? FML

by Anonymous / 06/02/2013 at 2:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking a peaceful stroll in the local park when a curious turkey decided to follow me. Trying to shoo it away, I swung my leg at it, as if to fake kick it. Being the stupid animal it is, it decided to fly into my leg as I swung, causing my foot to connect to its neck. It died. FML

by Anonymous / 03/03/2013 at 9:40am / Australia (Queensland) / Animals

Today, I was at Walmart when I saw my grandpa in the next aisle looking at magazines. Wanting to surprise him, I ran up behind him and hugged him around the middle. Up close, I realized he wasn't my grandpa. FML

by Oops / 12/25/2012 at 6:17am / United States (Maine) / Miscellaneous

Today, while lighting a cigarette, I learned the hard way that the amount of styling mousse I used to get my curly hair to become manageable, is the roughly same amount that causes it to become highly flammable. FML

by Awkward / 12/01/2012 at 5:11pm / Bahrain / Health

Today, I told my daughter that she won't be going to her homecoming dance as punishment for her terrible grades. She's been crying and singing "If I Die Young" in her room for hours. At this point, I don't know if I need to call a therapist or a vocal coach. FML

by Anonymous / 10/15/2012 at 12:07am / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, I had a serious talk with my boyfriend about our relationship troubles. He stopped me in the middle of a sentence with a huge fart. FML

by Anonymous / 09/11/2012 at 3:16pm / Sweden / Love

Today, a baseball bat fell on my head while my boyfriend and I were cuddling. The same baseball bat that he keeps next to the bed, because he genuinely fears a zombie outbreak. FML

by Anonymous / 08/24/2012 at 5:10pm / United Kingdom (Walsall) / Health

Today, my boyfriend again accused me of cheating on him. This time, it was because I delayed replying to his text message so I could feed my pet. Apparently I'm fucking my pet toad now. Jesus. FML

by youre dumped shitforbrain / 08/19/2012 at 12:52pm / Sweden (Sodermanlands Lan) / Love

Today, while looking through pictures of my boyfriend and me on Facebook, I noticed that in practically every single one featuring my best friend, his eyes are directed down her shirt. FML

by Anonymous / 07/07/2012 at 6:00pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I found out that I'm allergic to bacon. FML

by Dammit / 07/07/2012 at 12:45am / United States (California) / Health

Today, my grandmother was driving me to the mall. Suddenly, she stopped in the middle of the road. When I asked her what exactly she was doing, she said, "Oh, am I driving?" FML

by anonymus / 05/26/2012 at 9:48pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, it was the only time in my life that I have ever received an A+ for something. Thank you, eBay buyer. FML

by Anonymous / 04/10/2012 at 10:39am / Australia (South Australia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I caught myself staring at my grandmother's cleavage. FML

by bman / 04/07/2012 at 2:41am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, I was at a concert and a man came up behind and started to grind me. I pushed him away. He came back and pissed on my leg. FML

by Laura / 03/20/2012 at 6:27pm / United Kingdom (South Ayrshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother caught me masturbating. Trying to defuse the awkward tension, I said "Oh, I was just thinking about you!" Not a good idea. FML

by Fraser / 03/08/2012 at 2:03pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy