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if2013
  • Town/Country : Sydney, Australia
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Friday 3 March 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 106
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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if2013's favorite FMLs

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

#20617044
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68972) - you deserved it (3077)

On 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm - animals - by halliemarie1818 - United States

Today, I lost my dog and so I put up 'lost' signs. As I was coming back home I noticed one had been written on. It said: "Found your dog. Keeping it". FML

#20556107
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41564) - you deserved it (1959)

On 03/23/2013 at 7:43am - animals - by Hurrikhan - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, I took my driver's test. I did everything flawlessly, but my examiner kept all but pissing his pants throughout. He yelled, "ARE YOU TRYING TO GET US KILLED?!" when I drove past a traffic light just as it was about to turn red. The road was almost empty. He failed me on the spot. FML

#20517994
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9529) - you deserved it (35495)

On 02/22/2013 at 8:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, the police arrived at my door, telling me my child had been caught vandalizing. A boy who looked about 15 hugged me and said, "Hey, mum". I'm only 26 years old and had never seen this boy in my life. FML

#20473479
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31441) - you deserved it (1963)

On 01/22/2013 at 6:16pm - kids - by Female (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I finally got to conduct my first questioning of a suspect, who had been arrested in connection with a car theft. As I recited the Miranda warning to him, my mind went totally blank, and after a few seconds, he sarcastically continued the speech for me. FML

#20464395
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24620) - you deserved it (10437)

On 01/17/2013 at 12:15pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I had to watch my drunk girlfriend yell at a cat for not having periods. The worst part is that she was at a pet store. The pet store at which I work. FML

#20431107
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22519) - you deserved it (2221)

On 12/30/2012 at 12:20am - misc - by Wtf is wrong with her (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I stepped on the scale and realized that I weigh more than the amount of money that I have in my bank account. FML

#20199403
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19537) - you deserved it (5357)

On 12/10/2012 at 6:32pm - money - by ihncredible - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was so bored with my job at McDonald's that I actually hoped someone would come in and make a huge mess for me to clean. No one did. FML

#20173284
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13375) - you deserved it (2465)

On 11/22/2012 at 12:44am - work - by Ophelia - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my parents kindly told me what they are getting me for my 18th birthday. An eviction notice. FML

#20170511
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13638) - you deserved it (1942)

On 11/20/2012 at 1:47am - kids - by lea5459 - United States (Oregon)

Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML

#20155904
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31481) - you deserved it (1154)

On 11/09/2012 at 2:18am - love - by SebastianMiko (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was bitched out by my supervisor because of my lack of "customer service" skills. I work at a jail and all my "customers" are criminals. FML

#20152272
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16503) - you deserved it (2946)

On 11/07/2012 at 12:48am - work - by jailofc (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my dad watched the news and decided to start preparing for Hurricane Sandy by buying $300 worth of long-life and canned food. We live in Australia. FML

#20138384
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22597) - you deserved it (1225)

On 10/29/2012 at 8:03am - misc - by StormSeason (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I realized that my life would make an excellent meme: Nerd girl goes to college, finally loses virginity; gets chlamydia. FML

#20106351
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27153) - you deserved it (8811)

On 10/07/2012 at 8:24pm - intimacy - by Unfortunate (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was slapped by a fourteen-year-old girl because I was apparently "stealing her boyfriend." I'm twenty-five, and her boyfriend is my nephew. FML

#20100511
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22332) - you deserved it (1135)

On 10/03/2012 at 8:45pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I fell asleep at work and woke up with penis sharpied on my face. I'm a kindergarten teacher. FML

#20087243
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11146) - you deserved it (19318)

On 09/24/2012 at 9:51pm - kids - by Fingkids - United States



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