ieatunicorn4fun

Search for a member

ieatunicorn4fun

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 1950
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About ieatunicorn4fun : U mad bro?

ieatunicorn4fun's page activity

Visits<b>XxPojoxX</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 10:35pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 4:43pm<b>MetalManiacHappy</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 6:35pm<b>Purplehays</b> - the 12/01/2011 at 1:01am

ieatunicorn4fun's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of ieatunicorn4fun's badges

ieatunicorn4fun's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents got rid of our detachable shower head. Looks like I'm single again. FML

by sad / 10/25/2011 at 6:15am / Reserved / Intimacy

Today, my car broke down because someone stuck a dildo in the tail pipe. I'd parked in my driveway. FML

by Anonymous / 10/25/2011 at 1:58am / United States / Transportation

Today, working as an EMT on an ambulance, we had a patient who refused to accept that he had a massive GI bleed, despite the fact that bloody stool was flowing from his anus all over my ambulance. To make things worse, my EMT ride-along student puked all over the patient. FML

by fire1 / 10/25/2011 at 12:30am / United States (California) / Work

Today, a neo-Nazi stopped me and commented on my blue eyes and blonde hair. He went on to explain that I could be "pure", and should follow him and other Aryans in the campaign to eliminate Jews, and other "abominations". Good thing he didn't see the Star of David necklace around my neck. FML

by KaySchrages92 / 10/24/2011 at 9:46pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, whilst trying on a pair of jeans, I got my genitals caught in my fly. I'm a woman. FML

by box bulge / 10/20/2011 at 9:24pm / China / Health

Today, I went on a date with a respectable, successful, polite, and attractive guy. Ten minutes into the conversation, I find out he's a neo-Nazi and earned a swastika tattoo in prison for "something shady." FML

by thatgirl / 10/10/2011 at 3:16am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me for the first time. He stopped just as I was about to orgasm, and asked if I could finish by myself. Apparently he'd come up with a new algorithm for the Rubik's Cube on my desk and wanted to try it out. FML

by Kayt / 10/03/2011 at 12:38am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, my son thought it was a good idea to spray deodorant into his mouth because he wanted fresh breath. This resulted in him passing out. My son is 17. FML

by Ramis182 / 10/03/2011 at 12:26am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, I had a blind date with a really cute guy. Just when I was about to invite him back to my place for a nightcap, he took out a catalog of Russian mail-order brides and asked for my help in picking out the best one. FML

by NotRussian / 10/03/2011 at 12:15am / United States / Love

Today, I finally got intimate with the girl I like. As I started lifting her shirt, she stuck her hand down my pants and grabbed my junk. She immediately stopped what she was doing, snickered, and calmly said, "Take me home." FML

by Anonymous / 09/04/2011 at 12:21pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, while zooming down the interstate, I had to tell my husband to put his penis away. FML

by Wife / 08/07/2011 at 8:02pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, while using the restroom at McDonald's, a hand reached under my stall and took the remaining toilet paper. FML

by ewww / 07/30/2011 at 10:07am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, someone came over and told my mother, "I'm your son's friend Morris, I need to get something out of his car", so she gave him the keys. I have no friend called Morris, and now I don't have a sound system either. FML

by ceetee / 07/26/2011 at 9:35am / Australia (New South Wales) / Transportation

Today, I got a completely random boner at a coffee shop, five seconds before two attractive women asked me to stand up and take their picture. FML

by Anonymous / 07/25/2011 at 1:11pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy

Today, I got a text message from my ex from about a year ago, asking if my 4-day-old son was his. I don't know what's sadder - the fact that he thinks a gestation period can last 11 months, or that he's more willing to step up to the plate than the baby's actual father. FML

by Anonymous / 07/11/2011 at 12:48am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous