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idlechaos's favorite FMLs
by cat lady / 08/30/2014 at 7:56am / Norway (Rogaland) / Animals
by Makeitdance / 05/11/2014 at 10:46am / United States (California) / Work
Today, things were getting heated with the girlfriend. We were mostly naked, but mostly wouldn't do, so I kissed her deeply and whispered into her ear, "You should lose some weight". Clothes. I meant to say clothes. FML
by Spooprfailed / 04/08/2014 at 1:32am / Canada (Manitoba) / Intimacy
Today, I was at Walmart and had to use the bathroom. I sat down and farted real loud. I didn't realize someone was in there with me until I heard a voice say, "Dude, that was a good one." It was a man's voice. I then realized I was in the men's restroom. FML
by dani / 03/24/2014 at 11:39pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
Today, my parents kicked me out of the house because they were having a party. They gave me twenty bucks to go see a movie. Well, the movie ended pretty quick, but the trauma of seeing my parents in a swingers' orgy will take some time getting over. FML
by why god / 11/25/2013 at 1:16am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by me / 11/20/2013 at 10:28am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by mathgenius / 10/08/2013 at 3:17pm / Norway (Hordaland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at my in-laws' house, and as I was walking to the living room I had my hands on the back of my hips supporting my back. My mother-in-law told me to stop because it makes me look pregnant. I'm 9 months pregnant. FML
by she knows / 10/08/2013 at 12:30pm / United States (Hawaii) / Miscellaneous
by Agax / 10/07/2013 at 8:21pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 01/12/2013 at 12:57pm / Norway (Rogaland) / Love
Today, I found out my late grandfather left me a significant amount of money in his will. I thought it was weird because he always acted like he hated me. When I got the envelope, there was $500,000 inside, all in Monopoly money. FML
by Rachel / 07/20/2012 at 1:13am / United States / Money
by Anonymous / 07/19/2012 at 10:11pm / Canada (Alberta) / Health
by hotpatata / 07/06/2012 at 11:03am / United States / Miscellaneous
by creeped out / 06/12/2012 at 2:28pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his…
- Today, my university fridge is so small that the cucumber I bought doesn’t fit either lengthwise or… Today, after shaking my boss's hand, I noticed that he had a piece of toilet paper stuck to one of… Today, I live in Romania and my walls are particularly thin. After enduring my neighbor’s parties,…