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idk437

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idk437
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 1472
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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idk437's favorite FMLs

Today, I am 3 months pregnant. While lying on the couch with morning sickness, my boyfriend farted loudly and filled the room with a smell so horrifying that I immediately threw up all over my coffee table. He spent the next 20 minutes texting his friends about this "epic" moment. FML

#13777689
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32173) - you deserved it (5485)

On 11/09/2010 at 1:32pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went shopping with my new "It's true, I'm a Ninja" shirt on. Suddenly an apple comes and hits me right in the eye. A little boy runs up to me, yells "You aren't a Ninja! A Ninja would have caught that!", and runs off. FML

#13756412
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16494) - you deserved it (46688)

On 11/07/2010 at 8:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I'm training to be a nurse in a hospital. Our teacher asked for a volunteer to demonstrate how bed restraints work. After I was shackled to the bed she said, "Now let's make sure they work. Are you ticklish?" My entire class tickled me until I screamed, cried and nearly wet my pants. FML

#13699174
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25222) - you deserved it (3630)

On 11/03/2010 at 8:08am - work - by nurse (woman) - Reserved

Today, I saw a portable speed camera on the highway and braked hard. I caused a 4 car pile-up and my car is totaled. It wasn't a speed camera. FML

#13698951
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4881) - you deserved it (39465)

On 11/03/2010 at 7:23am - misc - by Gemma - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was so lonely that I had a 3 hour conversation with a one-legged cricket I found in my room. I'm keeping him. He has a name. FML

#13696157
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25153) - you deserved it (8228)

On 11/03/2010 at 12:39am - misc - by nk (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I went to kiss my girlfriend on the neck while she was cooking on the stove. Apparently I scared her and now I have a nice burn mark on my head from the hot frying pan she hit me with. FML

#13692696
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16627) - you deserved it (6607)

On 11/02/2010 at 8:57pm - misc - by StayPositive - United States (Maine)

Today, at school I pulled my bicep muscle arm wrestling. I lost. He was 14. I'm the 23 year old security guard. FML

#13657321
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16890) - you deserved it (7797)

On 10/31/2010 at 12:06am - work - by Disappointed - United States (New Jersey)

Today, a kid came Trick-or-Treating at my house. When I told her it was still one more day until Halloween, and that I didn't have any candy, she wound-up her fist, punched me in the groin, and ran off laughing. FML

#13653638
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20510) - you deserved it (3237)

On 10/30/2010 at 8:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my daughter came up to me crying. When I asked her what was wrong, she told me that she had a fight with her imaginary boyfriend. She's 16. I raised this child. FML

#13645205
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34094) - you deserved it (9656)

On 10/30/2010 at 1:07am - kids - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Taranaki)

Today, as a physics teacher, I was testing a class to see how high a sound frequency they could hear. One girl claimed she could hear the sound even though it was physically impossible. Without thinking, I replied "Only dogs can hear this frequency." Needless to say, she was picked on all day. FML

#13636606
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20951) - you deserved it (9069)

On 10/29/2010 at 8:17am - kids - by mrtut (man) - United Kingdom (Merseyside)

Today, I texted my dad and told him I was getting married in five months. His reply: "I gotta work that day." FML

#13636513
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22166) - you deserved it (2419)

On 10/29/2010 at 8:02am - misc - by Kristinmarsh08 - United States (Texas)

Today, I babysat my neighbour's spoilt bratty twins. When I told them it was their bed time, they pushed me over. One then started smashing me with a plastic sword, and as I lay helpless on the floor the other one peed on me. I got owned by two five year olds. FML

#13587317
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13833) - you deserved it (20261)

On 10/25/2010 at 6:06am - misc - by peestain (man) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, my girlfriend came over to me, like she was going to kiss me, and instead rubbed her chin all over my face, exclaiming, "Can you feel my beard coming in?" Yes, yes I could. FML

#13570264
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30572) - you deserved it (2846)

On 10/24/2010 at 12:11am - love - by altocrm - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was sitting in a lecture about the history of the KKK and the problems it has caused, when the weirdest and quietest kid leans over my shoulder and says "I'd burn you first..." and winks. FML

#13455190
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27317) - you deserved it (2821)

On 10/15/2010 at 2:00am - misc - by racist - United States

Today, I met a guy that I liked. We really hit it off, that is until his parents walked by and he started begging them, down on his hands and knees, to buy him a new video game. FML

#13454084
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21435) - you deserved it (2907)

On 10/15/2010 at 12:18am - love - by lilshoobydoo14 - United States (Illinois)



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