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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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icantellu

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icantellu
  • Town/Country : Boring, Maryland, USA [=
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 27 September 1992 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 1543
  • Number of comments : 144
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About icantellu : Hey, I'm awesome...True story xD

"Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak."

"Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich."

"Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity."

If you're looking at my picture: I'm in the purple

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icantellu's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML

#15472026 (426)

I agree, your life sucks (39354) - you deserved it (6108)

On 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm - misc - by omg - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found some nude vintage pictures in my house. I decided to beat my meat to them. Later I found out it was my grandma. FML

#14583340 (220)

I agree, your life sucks (11077) - you deserved it (53636)

On 01/14/2011 at 11:05pm - intimacy - by Gabriel A - United States (Ohio)

Today, my math teacher told me to learn how to say "welcome to wal-mart". FML

#11283515 (185)

I agree, your life sucks (27953) - you deserved it (7801)

On 06/18/2010 at 3:13am - work - by Stevo - United States (Washington)

Today, I discovered the guy that sits next to me in class is actually a girl. Not only is that bad, but we had to write a paper about each other. I used the words "him" and "he", and read it to the whole class. FML

#5022453 (165)

I agree, your life sucks (20044) - you deserved it (27258)

On 09/03/2009 at 4:28pm - misc - by Whoops (woman) - United States (Delaware)

Today, I saw a video of me last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" naked. FML

#4679110 (343)

I agree, your life sucks (34981) - you deserved it (98549)

On 08/20/2009 at 10:39am - misc - by ShiriSarah (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his family. They were drinking and having fun, so I joined in. I had one too many, got really goofy and then suggested the farting game. "Sorry, I can't hold my liquor!" I quickly explained. My boyfriend's mom shot me a cold look and said, "It's non-alcoholic." FML

#4622066 (236)

I agree, your life sucks (7067) - you deserved it (61314)

On 08/18/2009 at 4:04am - misc - by probably_the_ex_now (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my adorable 8 year old son told me he no longer wanted me to pick him up from school. When I asked why he said. "I told everyone at school my mommy is pretty... and I don't want people to know I lied". FML

#2876647 (186)

I agree, your life sucks (65815) - you deserved it (2678)

On 06/14/2009 at 1:42am - kids - by andthatshowitgoes (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, after the church service was over, my two year old granddaughter started to sing into the microphone. She said, "Here Nana, you sing". I picked up the microphone and sang " Jesus Loves Me". She took the microphone back and said, "No he doesn't." FML

#2076493 (265)

I agree, your life sucks (50348) - you deserved it (5966)

On 05/19/2009 at 10:04am - kids - by nana (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I bought a coral colored hooded sweatshirt, which my girlfriend told me was "hot". I wore it to a baseball game tonight. When it got cold I put the hood over my head, only to hear everyone behind me laugh. The back of the hood said "Boy crazy". It was a teen girls sweatshirt. FML

#963370 (123)

I agree, your life sucks (13463) - you deserved it (49164)

On 04/14/2009 at 1:10am - misc - by khood (man) - United States

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it he said "I don't know what you're talking about Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

#159600 (93)

I agree, your life sucks (737847) - you deserved it (61015)

On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)