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icandothecancan

Offline (the 03/31/2014 at 9:38am) | Search for a member

icandothecancan

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 185
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 7 posted

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icandothecancan's page activity

Visits<b>okcnation</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 3:02pm<b>TatiLoves</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 4:26am<b>GentlemanBastard</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 4:10pm<b>dextrementor</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 8:00pm<b>the1pumpCHUMP</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 12:30am<b>Nevracceptdefeat</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 3:54pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 11:42pm<b>alexhanakahi</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 10:15pm<b>CLFML</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 3:22am<b>k4m1k4z3</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 12:31am<b>Gremlinek</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 11:06pm<b>tuckit</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 10:31pm<b>IloveToLaugh143</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 12:44pm<b>therosalina</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 10:00am<b>srinivasawesum</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 2:53am<b>Claytonioo</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 11:34pm<b>staaacey</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 8:34pm<b>BigL99</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 6:17pm

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icandothecancan's favorite FMLs

Today, while in the yard, my 18-month-old son decided to take off running into the road, where a car was driving. I rushed after him, only for one of my dress straps to suddenly break without warning. It must have looked like I was trying to flag down the driver with my flailing tit. FML

#21183414
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41649) - you deserved it (5531)

On 06/21/2014 at 7:14pm - misc - by icandothecancan - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I clogged my girlfriend's toilet, so being a gentleman, I tried to rectify the situation. I plunged the holy fuck out of that damned toilet, only for her to accuse me of jacking off because I was taking so long. When she stormed in and the smell hit her, she called me a pig. I just can't win. FML

#21159437
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46773) - you deserved it (4932)

On 06/01/2014 at 2:34pm - misc - by shart up, your puns suck (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I took my son to lunch. After we ate, the waitress came over and told me that my son was the most well-behaved child they had ever had there. His response was to pull his pants down and moon the entire restaurant while smacking his bottom. FML

Today, I realised the only preparation I've done for my final French exam has been wanking off to French porn. FML

#21135849
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21481) - you deserved it (51445)

On 05/10/2014 at 4:52pm - intimacy - by vivelawank - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend suggested we try something new and spontaneous. Excited to find out first-hand what she had in mind, and ready to fool around, I hurried over to her place. Turns out she's just taken up vegan cooking. FML

#21133708
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34112) - you deserved it (5903)

On 05/07/2014 at 11:01pm - misc - by veggiedude - United States (California)

Today, to teach my 14-year-old son a serious lesson for bullying a child at school again, I grounded him for the rest of the year. He just snorted and said, "Cool, I'll just jack off all year then! Thanks, mum!" and happily retreated to his bedroom. FML

#21132433
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42656) - you deserved it (8177)

On 05/06/2014 at 2:38pm - kids - by Satan's Mum (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was taking the biggest shit of my life. When I worked the thing out, it hit the water with such force that I got a toilet water enema from the backwash. I was so freaked out that I screamed and fell off the seat, prompting my husband to rush in to see what was wrong. FML

#21111156
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35578) - you deserved it (8366)

On 04/12/2014 at 2:07pm - misc - by traumatized (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was taking a piss when a fly landed inside the urinal. I thought it would be funny to try to aim and pee on it until it flew away and I stupidly continued aiming, peeing all over the floor and the wall. Another man came in time to see it. FML

#21026318
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21767) - you deserved it (48452)

On 01/13/2014 at 2:34am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

#21023934
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46199) - you deserved it (8700)

On 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found a great recipe for dinner, and emailed it to myself with the subject "Dinner tonight". Hours later, I'd forgotten all about it, opened my emails, saw the subject line, and thought someone was asking me out to dinner. I got really excited until I saw the sender address. FML

#21019190
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45212) - you deserved it (14127)

On 01/06/2014 at 3:57pm - misc - by Mels (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, was my first day as a male cheerleader in an attempt to flirt. The girls were stronger than me and it's now my job to be thrown in the air by girls. FML

#21017728
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41387) - you deserved it (33563)

On 01/05/2014 at 11:16am - love - by give me an F - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)



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