Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ibigda

Search for a member

ibigda

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 133
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

ibigda's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

ibigda's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend fed me chocolate chip cookies with laxatives in them because he was concerned I did not poop enough. FML

#15012596
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34558) - you deserved it (3787)

On 02/17/2011 at 3:08am - health - by clashgurl8449 -

Today, I had a panic attack because I was constipated. FML

#14692086
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20503) - you deserved it (8083)

On 01/23/2011 at 10:41pm - health - by Sostupid (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I am 3 months pregnant. While lying on the couch with morning sickness, my boyfriend farted loudly and filled the room with a smell so horrifying that I immediately threw up all over my coffee table. He spent the next 20 minutes texting his friends about this "epic" moment. FML

#13777689
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38105) - you deserved it (6852)

On 11/09/2010 at 1:32pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was rushed to the hospital to deliver my child. On the way, I called my husband who was in a bar with his friends. Drunk, he just yelled, "BROS BEFORE HOS!!" and hung up. FML

#13318955
321 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68809) - you deserved it (7745)

On 10/04/2010 at 5:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my four year old daughter pulled her pants down in the middle of Best Buy. Apparently, you can smell the farts better when they don't have to pass through clothing. FML

#13312784
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29594) - you deserved it (4744)

On 10/04/2010 at 1:48am - kids - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I attempted to be nice and hold a door open for a person in a wheelchair. He hit the button to open another door. While I pointed out that I would hold the door for him, I realized that the door I was holding open for him led down some stairs. FML

#13227031
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9413) - you deserved it (30670)

On 09/27/2010 at 8:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, my boyfriend was telling me about accidentally punching his best friend in the face. As he was acting it out he ended up punching me and giving me a bloody nose. FML

#8541185
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23503) - you deserved it (2826)

On 02/22/2010 at 12:44am - health - by Username - United States

Today, my boyfriend called me over, all just to unclog his toilet. It was clogged because he put my phone in it while he was taking a dump to see if it would actually flush. FML

#8445631
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24329) - you deserved it (4609)

On 02/19/2010 at 3:18pm - love - by wtfuraretard (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, while at a family get together, my bowels suddenly decided they needed to be emptied. Straight away. I felt bad enough using someone else's bathroom for this, but later, my sister came in and loudly said "God, Brian, what the hell have you been eating?" in front of everyone at the get together. FML

#8285725
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20351) - you deserved it (2848)

On 02/15/2010 at 2:08am - misc - by MisterBrown (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went indoor rock climbing with my uncle and his 5 year-old girl. I'm about halfway up the hardest ascent when my arm cramps up. As I stretched my arm, my cousin yells up at me in her tiny voice, "Prove you're a man and climb that wall!" I fell off. I was emasculated by a 5 year-old. FML

#7821444
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19128) - you deserved it (5019)

On 02/02/2010 at 7:01pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my uncle died. It was also my grandpa's 85th birthday. His reaction to the death? "Best birthday gift ever!" FML

#7396511
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29735) - you deserved it (2381)

On 01/17/2010 at 10:58am - misc - by poppet2010 - Sent from mobile version

Today, the little boy I nanny for finally stood up and went 'pee-pee on the potty'. I started cheering and clapping, making a big deal out of it. I flushed while he smiled proudly and pooped on the floor. FML

#7278236
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25440) - you deserved it (3081)

On 01/11/2010 at 1:08pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend took me on a surprise date, destination unknown. I dressed up, he had a tux on. We went to McDonalds. FML

#7275628
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35144) - you deserved it (5142)

On 01/11/2010 at 8:25am - love - by krisx3ftw (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on in his room. In a sexy voice, I asked him, "What are you thinking right now?" He replied, "I'm thinkin' Arby's." FML

#7225857
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18071) - you deserved it (5070)

On 01/08/2010 at 10:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my husband is completely convinced that his taking a massive dump after being constipated is exactly like the time I gave birth to our twins. FML

#7215962
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30370) - you deserved it (3934)

On 01/08/2010 at 11:32am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)



FML's blog

  • Jim Trim's Illustrated FML
  • Action stations! I'm back from my holiday, I've got some sort of weirdly uneven tan and I already want to go back to the beach to bum about and finish off my colouring book. But I can't. I'm still…

Friday 29 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: