iambatman123

Search for a member

iambatman123

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 5 June 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1580
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About iambatman123 : hi. i'm heather :)

film, heavy metal, & the cowboys

yupyup.

iambatman123's page activity

Visits<b>twilight2002</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 7:38am<b>jelly_bennett</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 9:49pm<b>mitchellkirk2</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 11:31pm<b>duma191</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 10:52pm<b>next_session</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 8:59am<b>missmorggan</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 11:10am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 7:48am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 3:14pm<b>hatebreeder666</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 2:42pm<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 8:46pm<b>noahg45</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 5:41pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 4:14pm<b>xLIGHTS</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 11:34pm<b>I_Am_Lamp_</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 3:58pm<b>DerpyDerpinator</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 10:07am<b>Iwantboobs1234</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 11:42pm<b>vanessa_tranz</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 6:18pm<b>Prerogative</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 8:07pm

iambatman123's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

iambatman123's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a store to buy pants for a new job. A really hot guy helped me get a pair down from a high shelf so I could try them on. He had flirted with me so I hurried in the fitting room so I could go talk to him. Note to self: Check to see if you have pants on after trying on clothes. FML

by sweet92 / 05/15/2009 at 12:32am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I lost track of time while rocking out, butt-naked, to Kelly Clarkson and Michelle Branch after taking a shower. Three of my metalhead friends had let themselves in my house and were on the lower level laughing their butts off at me for 30 minutes before telling me. I'm a 23 year old guy. FML

by Anonymous / 05/05/2009 at 2:26am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom and I went to Winn-Dixie. I told her I was going to a different isle 5 minutes later I hear my name on the intercom to go to the front of the store. As I go I see my mom crying, she comes and hugs me and tells me she thought I was lost. Im 22, I had my cell phone, and I drove there. FML

by SwimSquid / 04/15/2009 at 2:38pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I bought a coral colored hooded sweatshirt, which my girlfriend told me was "hot". I wore it to a baseball game tonight. When it got cold I put the hood over my head, only to hear everyone behind me laugh. The back of the hood said "Boy crazy". It was a teen girls sweatshirt. FML

by khood / 04/14/2009 at 1:10am / United States / Love

Today, my grandmother gave me a huge speech on being abstinent until marriage. Being the honest person that I am, I told her I wasn't a virgin anymore. Instead of being mad and telling me I was going to hell. She asked me what my favourite things to do sexually were. And told me hers in detail. FML

by Anonymous / 04/11/2009 at 8:20pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, I had to sleep in the same room as my grandparents. They checked to see if I was asleep, so I pretended to be to avoid getting scolded for staying up. Turns out they were checking so that they could make love. I witnessed two 70-year-olds have sex in the bed next to me for 20 minutes. FML

by Mike / 03/21/2009 at 11:38am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, a girl-scout asked me to buy cookies, in front of Giant. She looked nice, so I bought 5 boxes from her. She took the money and went home with her mom. I opened the boxes when I got home and realized that the boxes just had rocks in them. I got scammed by a girl-scout. FML

by twit / 03/15/2009 at 9:14pm / United States (Maryland) / Money

Today, I was teaching a swimming lesson to 6-7 year old boys and girls. I recently broke up with my boyfriend so I haven't been taking care of my bikini line. While I was demonstrating how to do a whip-kick out of the water one of the boys said, "You have a beard coming out of your bathing suit!" FML

by superfkd / 03/14/2009 at 10:27pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, my Christian boyfriend of six months broke up with me. I had told him when we started dating that I was an atheist, and he just now decided to look up what it is. He gave me a bible. FML

by Noname / 03/14/2009 at 12:48pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I went to go get a haircut and I asked how much it was for a haircut, shampoo, and a blow job. I meant to say blow dry. FML

by Stixchop / 02/26/2009 at 6:21pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got up at 5am, brushed my teeth, shaved and showered to get ready for work only to step barefoot in a huge pile of dog crap in the middle of my living room floor. I don't own a dog. FML

by RustyBulletHole / 02/04/2009 at 2:53am / United States (Illinois) / Animals

Today, I danced with a girl until the bar closed. We went back to my place. She had a penis. FML

by Noname / 01/22/2009 at 6:27pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, I received a really nice red satin set of underwear, with a bra, a thong and a corset... From my grandfather. FML

by noname / 01/07/2009 at 6:43am / Miscellaneous

Today, I had an important interview. On the way there, I stopped in front of a car window to look at my reflection, checking I didn't have salad stuck between my teeth. Having pulled several faces, I realised that there were two girls inside the car, cracking up with laughter. FML

by Groom / 11/30/2008 at 5:51am / Miscellaneous