About iamabamf : Everything I do is motherfucking awesome.
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Today, my girlfriend went in for a kiss too fast and broke my front tooth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17869) - you deserved it (1469)
On 05/20/2012 at 1:19am - misc - by slayerdeath - United States (Indiana)
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He said it was because my mom's lazy eye creeps him out, and that my dad hates him. She doesn't have a lazy eye, he's never met my dad, never seen my mom, and now according to his friends, he's been cheating on me for the past two weeks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22128) - you deserved it (1441)
On 05/19/2012 at 7:20pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Sri Lanka (Western)
Today, I was about to get in the shower, when I felt an odd itch in my navel. I saw what I thought was bellybutton lint, so I pulled on it, and quickly realized what I had between my fingers was a still-squirming, headless tick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21545) - you deserved it (1648)
On 05/19/2012 at 6:54pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, my daughter's bed broke. Trying to see the damage, I lay down on her floor to get a closer look. I saw mountains of condom boxes under there. Now I know why the bed broke. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28894) - you deserved it (3585)
On 05/19/2012 at 11:08am - intimacy - by maggierose171 - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, at my wedding, my husband's drunk friend admitted that the only reason my husband and I started dating was because he was dared. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19139) - you deserved it (1506)
On 05/19/2012 at 12:17am - love - by Asdf649 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, the "My body is beautiful" t-shirt that my therapist gave me didn't fit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20817) - you deserved it (5223)
On 05/18/2012 at 10:46pm - health - by msassy - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was at the laundromat when a huge, tattoo-covered man wearing nothing but denim booty shorts and a wife-beater sat down beside me. He stared at me for a while, before telling me all about how I reminded him of his "first prison bitch." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18909) - you deserved it (1238)
On 05/18/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I brought my boyfriend home, and I introduced him to my parents. Afterwards, I took him to my room so we could have some "bonding" time. Right as things got pretty intense, I heard my dad yell, "Stop faking, honey." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8212) - you deserved it (19624)
On 05/18/2012 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by iris (woman) - Portugal (Lisboa)
Today, I went to the water park with my boyfriend. A swimsuit was required to go on the rides. My bikini straps somehow got torn off and I had nothing else with me. My boyfriend said, "Hell, just wear my spare shorts. You could pass as a guy with your chest". FML
I agree, your life sucks (22245) - you deserved it (2091)
On 05/18/2012 at 3:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I finally gained the nerve to ask out the girl of my dreams. She responded by saying, "You need to lower your standards." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19626) - you deserved it (1835)
On 05/17/2012 at 5:07pm - love - by colts609380 - United States (California)
Today, as part of my medical anatomy course, I had to give a presentation about an STD and the effects it has on women. The class was comprised almost entirely of girls. I become extremely anxious and accidentally stated "Vaginas are smelly" as my opening statement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10320) - you deserved it (16446)
On 05/17/2012 at 4:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, my first date consisted of him and me in the emergency room of the hospital after his little brother hit me in the face with a baseball bat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17710) - you deserved it (177)
On 05/17/2012 at 1:05am - misc - by secret_source (woman) - United States
Today, in a training class, I got to see a picture of what can happen when a man does not wear a safety harness correctly. For those of you who are unaware, male body parts are easily severed by loose straps. I cannot un-see that picture. It wasn't even a harness safety class. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13428) - you deserved it (1383)
On 05/16/2012 at 11:53pm - misc - by recmonty - Canada (Saskatchewan)
Today, my boyfriend got mad at me because I refused to keep him company while he took a shit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15579) - you deserved it (2353)
On 05/16/2012 at 6:38pm - misc - by HK (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)
Today, I called my boyfriend during his lunch break. He started to place his order at a fast food joint, and trying to be funny, I started moaning sexily after each part of his order. I eventually realised I was on speaker when I heard snickering in the background. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4328) - you deserved it (17957)
On 05/16/2012 at 4:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Limburg)
Friday 24 May 2013
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