About iamabamf : Everything I do is motherfucking awesome.
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Today, I've been dating a girl for a year and she's only touched my penis twice. Once by accident. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16899) - you deserved it (7381)
On 01/20/2009 at 11:52am - love - by jobless - Sent from mobile version
Today, my mom gave me and my brothers each a cd of her recent photoshoot for her book. I found out later that my mom didn't know how to burn only SOME of the photos on the CD, and ended up burning all of the photos onto the CD. Some of the photos were provocative. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11478) - you deserved it (989)
On 01/18/2009 at 2:18pm - misc - by scarred4life - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was at Target with my mom. After 10 minutes of my mom walking around looking confused, I said, "Mom, what are you looking for? I worked at this place for 4 years, I know where everything is." My mom was looking for KY. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12978) - you deserved it (1622)
On 01/15/2009 at 6:08pm - misc - by kallens - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I received a text message from my girlfriend saying: "Do you remember last time we slept together?", I answer straight away "Of course I do, it was great!". To which she replies: "I hope you made the most of it: it was the last". FML
I agree, your life sucks (18129) - you deserved it (1435)
On 01/02/2009 at 12:37am - love - by Godmish - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was sitting on the bus on my commute to work, when I nodded off on the charming young man next to me. Something cold and wet touched me, and I looked down to see a small pool of my saliva collecting on my chest. The man thought this was hilarious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13116) - you deserved it (2898)
On 12/04/2008 at 10:45pm - misc - by Kerlane - Sent from mobile version
Today, after having waited three long months, my shy girlfriend finally gave me a blowjob. Everything was going really well until I said, "Wow, you're really talented. Anyone would think you've been practicing your whole life." FML
I agree, your life sucks (6294) - you deserved it (40381)
On 12/04/2008 at 12:55am - intimacy - by noname - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was going to confess to my best friend that I am madly in love with her. I called her up only to find her crying. She was upset that she might be pregnant with some guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25208) - you deserved it (1489)
On 11/25/2008 at 1:05pm - love - by Noname - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, I had a date with a girl. Wanting to make a good impression, I spend a lot of time getting ready and by the time I get to the place we were supposed to meet she isn't there anymore. I call her to see where she is. She's in bed with another guy and says "I was REALLY waiting for you". FML
I agree, your life sucks (18285) - you deserved it (5945)
Today, I was in an online chatroom speaking to this girl that I really hit it off with. She then confided in me that she'd recently been dumped by her boyfriend and that he was a jerk. A little while later, we exchanged photos. It was my ex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34839) - you deserved it (5498)
On 11/17/2008 at 6:27am - love - by Darkheaven - Sent from mobile version
Today, I sent a text message to my girlfriend telling her how much I wanted to make love to her tonight. I've just realized I sent it to her brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30924) - you deserved it (14488)
On 11/14/2008 at 6:20am - intimacy - by Kaji - Sent from mobile version
Today, I sent a text message to my girlfriend telling her how much I wanted to make love to her tonight. I've just realized I sent it to her brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30924) - you deserved it (14488)
On 11/14/2008 at 6:20am - intimacy - by Kaji - Sent from mobile version
Today, during a never-ending dinner with really boring friends, I faked being tired and told my husband, "Let’s go honey, we have a long way to drive home." He looks at me and says, "Well… we are at home." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11734) - you deserved it (54932)
On 11/07/2008 at 12:47am - misc - by alice5000 - Sent from mobile version
Today, for the first time I sat next to a hot babe. I was feeling nervous, nevertheless, I managed to shyly ask her phone number. It’s only when I arrived back home that I realized there was a digit missing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52032) - you deserved it (12443)
On 10/13/2008 at 4:22am - misc - by mehdi-online -
Friday 24 May 2013
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