Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

iamabamf

Search for a member

iamabamf

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5353
  • Number of comments : 99
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 5 posted

About iamabamf : Why can't I change my username? Fuck.

iamabamf's page activity

Visits<b>Trollx</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 3:50pm<b>ragingatheist</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 10:23pm<b>CTPope74</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 4:56pm<b>fourth_line_dust</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 7:15pm<b>94cobain</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 12:32pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 3:13am<b>Zerizle</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 6:14pm<b>Shamp0wa</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 2:50pm<b>sprechensiedick</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 8:21pm<b>kelxdao</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 6:02am<b>hoothootbi</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 10:04am<b>jml7999</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 11:44pm<b>gamerkz</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 9:18am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 12:08am<b>Da_Bozz</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 1:57pm<b>RubenTheGreek</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 6:45pm<b>naaudisz30</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 12:33am<b>DuckAssassin32</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 7:53am

iamabamf's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of iamabamf's badges

iamabamf's favorite FMLs

Today, I called my boyfriend crying to tell him I had the most terrible day. He said I should come over, and he would make me feel better. I said I just want to snuggle, and I was impressed with his sincerity. Then he said, "Can we snuggle... with my dick in you?" FML

#121139
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70206) - you deserved it (18366)

On 02/24/2009 at 2:31am - intimacy - by addictedtofml (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was watching a documentary on The World's Fattest Man. Half way through the show the reported started talking about his girlfriend. The Fattest Man in the world has a girlfriend. I'm 21 an have never had a girlfriend. FML

#82135
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51201) - you deserved it (8167)

On 02/19/2009 at 8:39pm - love - by Skido (man) - United States (California)

Today, me and my boyfriend were hooking up while watching a movie. Just as I was getting really into it, he told me to move my head. He couldn't see the television. FML

#71498
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33265) - you deserved it (5282)

On 02/18/2009 at 7:55pm - intimacy - by happyasaclam (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, at Church, the little boy sitting behind me asked his mother if I had the chicken pox, because there were red dots all over my face. I've had bad acne since I was twelve. FML

#69964
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44170) - you deserved it (3427)

On 02/18/2009 at 5:09pm - kids - by Spotted (man) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I listened to my room mate having sex from 3 A.M. until 6 A.M. When I looked over at my girlfriend, who must have thought I was sleeping, I noticed she was masturbating. FML

#30994
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41459) - you deserved it (10549)

On 02/12/2009 at 12:25pm - intimacy - by skipper - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I found out my teacher writes descriptions next to people's names on the register to remind him who people were. By mistake the descriptions appeared on the computer projector. Next to my name it said "Tubby". FML

#30377
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39873) - you deserved it (4745)

On 02/12/2009 at 8:37am - misc - by atterz123 (man) - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, I played games on Barbie.com and gave up after 10 minutes. They were hard. FML

#14117
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9775) - you deserved it (36586)

On 02/07/2009 at 10:19pm - misc - by lilzoot (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I woke up to my car covered in shaving cream and tampons and the word CHEATER written on my windshield in lipstick. The guy a few doors down from me in my dorm has the same car as me. I'm a virgin. FML

#10643
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42774) - you deserved it (1996)

On 02/05/2009 at 5:34pm - misc - by CB4 (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I made my new girlfriend orgasm for the first time. All she said after was "I drooled a little". FML

#4642
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32764) - you deserved it (5149)

On 02/01/2009 at 10:48am - intimacy - by nicknack22 - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was playing with 3 kids I look after. The middle one has just learned about sex and started chanting that I had done it with the eldest as a joke. We were in the garden and the neighbours heard. Now I am fired, have to leave the house and am being investigated by the police. FML

#4463
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59032) - you deserved it (2676)

On 02/01/2009 at 3:54am - intimacy - by Jack - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I tried to befriend the lonely boy who sits at the end of my table at lunch. He always sleeps or does homework during lunch. I walked over to him, tripped, and spilled my open bottle of water on his jeans. I apologized profusely and wiped off his pants with napkins. He got hard. FML

#4106
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29124) - you deserved it (9802)

On 01/31/2009 at 12:01pm - intimacy - by brighteyes - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found my drunken roommate asleep in my bed, naked, after he'd peed himself. FML

#3934
12 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23427) - you deserved it (1430)

On 01/30/2009 at 11:40pm - misc - by shit - United States (New York)

Today, I thought I was giving a woman the orgasm of a lifetime until I realized that she was telling me to stop pulling her hair. FML

#3826
10 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9521) - you deserved it (38507)

On 01/30/2009 at 4:07pm - intimacy - by Hubris - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I marked the 6th anniversary of the last time I had intercourse. FML

#3114
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34392) - you deserved it (4975)

On 01/28/2009 at 3:18pm - misc - by Noname - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: