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iamabamf

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iamabamf

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5356
  • Number of comments : 99
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 5 posted

About iamabamf : Why can't I change my username? Fuck.

iamabamf's page activity

Visits<b>Trollx</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 3:50pm<b>ragingatheist</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 10:23pm<b>CTPope74</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 4:56pm<b>fourth_line_dust</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 7:15pm<b>94cobain</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 12:32pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 3:13am<b>Zerizle</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 6:14pm<b>Shamp0wa</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 2:50pm<b>sprechensiedick</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 8:21pm<b>kelxdao</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 6:02am<b>hoothootbi</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 10:04am<b>jml7999</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 11:44pm<b>gamerkz</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 9:18am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 12:08am<b>Da_Bozz</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 1:57pm<b>RubenTheGreek</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 6:45pm<b>naaudisz30</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 12:33am<b>DuckAssassin32</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 7:53am

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iamabamf's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my grandmother passed away. When I told my boyfriend I began to cry. Instead of caring, he said "you're getting my bed wet," rolled over, and fell asleep. FML

#1631844
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74758) - you deserved it (5868)

On 05/04/2009 at 4:44pm - misc - by JessBaby (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I left a party after drinking, and was soon pulled over. I frantically grabbed my mouthwash I keep for emergency situations to cover up the alcohol smell on my breath. I was given the breathalyzer almost immediately. I blew a 2.37. Apparently, alcohol is the main ingredient of Listerine. FML

#1550059
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29586) - you deserved it (268428)

On 05/02/2009 at 2:21am - health - by breathalizard (man) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, I had an ultrasound in fear of testicular cancer. I apparently signed papers allowing an intern to do it for practice. She was in her early 20s and smoking hot so as she was rubbing jelly on my testes I got an erection. FML

#1525413
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72010) - you deserved it (24613)

On 05/01/2009 at 2:21pm - intimacy - by erectioninfection (man) - United States

Today, I had an ultrasound in fear of testicular cancer. I apparently signed papers allowing an intern to do it for practice. She was in her early 20s and smoking hot so as she was rubbing jelly on my testes I got an erection. FML

#1525413
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72010) - you deserved it (24613)

On 05/01/2009 at 2:21pm - intimacy - by erectioninfection (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend was complaining that we don't have "a song". Irritated, I told her that I'd put on the radio, and whatever song was playing was our song from now on. I switched on the radio, and "It's Not Fair" by Lily Allen was playing. Our song is about premature ejaculation. FML

#1427967
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15391) - you deserved it (56044)

On 04/28/2009 at 4:52pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Swindon)

Today, I went out with a girl who I really love. We arrived to her house and before she got out of the car, I attempted to kiss her as planned. Still drunk, I grabbed her head and twisted it when I kissed her. She's now wearing a neck brace. Real smooth. FML

#1415940
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15121) - you deserved it (82063)

On 04/28/2009 at 4:53am - love - by H-B (man) - United States

Today, I ran into a girl I used to go to school with. We went out for dinner to catch up, and we ended up at my house, watching movies and cuddling. This fantastic and spontaneous date was concluded with several kisses. I dropped her off at her car and drove off. I forgot to get her number. FML

Today, I was giving my crush a lift home from a mutual friend's house. When he got in the car, my mom asked in French, "Is this the guy you won't stop talking about? You can do so much better!" Of all the things I've told about him to my mom, I forgot to mention he's French as well. FML

#1380025
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55250) - you deserved it (11276)

On 04/27/2009 at 12:43am - love - by frenchgirlll (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my fiancée got out of the shower, completely shaved. I went over to her, wrapped her in a hug and asked her what the occasion was. She pulled away and said that she had a gyno appointment. My fiancée will clean up for the gyno, but not for me. FML

#1358380
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50424) - you deserved it (9611)

On 04/26/2009 at 3:15pm - love - by jimboxo (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, While I was running around the block I had this urge to spit. Suddenly I noticed this beautiful girl running in front me. Trying to impress her, I smiled and by mistake drooled everything on the pavement. She wasn't impressed. FML

#1299793
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13303) - you deserved it (43755)

On 04/24/2009 at 8:13pm - misc - by djteller (man) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, I was at the gym when I saw one of my friends at the water fountain. I went over and gave him a man ass slap while he was drinking. It wasn't my friend. I now have a black eye. FML

#1288904
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12148) - you deserved it (59804)

On 04/24/2009 at 1:20pm - health - by JohnFarrell (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was meeting my girlfriend at the airport after studying abroad for a year. She ran to hug me, and I wanted to pick her up and spin her around, like they do in those romantic movies. I tried to do that, but instead I dropped her. FML

#1268284
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17817) - you deserved it (49828)

On 04/23/2009 at 7:43pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. She started panting harder and going, "AH, AH, AH..." and I thought she was about to come. Next thing I know, there's snot splattered all over my face and neck. Turns out it was a sneeze. FML

#1259503
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69795) - you deserved it (8084)

On 04/23/2009 at 3:47pm - intimacy - by snotface (man) - United States (New York)

Today, as soon as I got home, my girlfriend was waiting for me at the door. She told me she was breaking up with me, the reason? She found a girl's shirt in my closet and that she didn't need a cheating boyfriend. That shirt was mine. FML

#1226975
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56068) - you deserved it (11420)

On 04/22/2009 at 4:15pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I brought a cute guy back from the bar to have sex. He was drunk, so he had trouble getting it up, and I said jokingly "you need to work on that". We fell asleep, and I woke up the next morning to him gone and a note that said "you need to work on not farting in your sleep". FML

#1222534
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20964) - you deserved it (79911)

On 04/22/2009 at 1:46pm - intimacy - by Screwed (woman) - United States (Mississippi)



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