iamabamf

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iamabamf

9Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 13207
  • Number of comments : 99
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 5 posted

About iamabamf : Why can't I change my username? Fuck.

iamabamf's page activity

Visits<b>chrisfromCanada</b> - the 09/20/2016 at 2:43pm<b>Nick_Pat91</b> - the 09/14/2016 at 1:06pm<b>ruudseriesx</b> - the 09/11/2016 at 12:47am<b>Kayouri</b> - the 09/06/2016 at 3:02am<b>Azlarus</b> - the 09/06/2016 at 2:09am<b>devinthomas</b> - the 08/19/2016 at 10:47pm<b>thundercrow1999</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 5:41am<b>Chris2daO</b> - the 08/02/2016 at 8:24pm<b>Maddii1112</b> - the 07/30/2016 at 1:20am<b>jackipdoc</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 3:39pm<b>jewbacca188</b> - the 06/10/2016 at 10:36am<b>db32</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 2:01pm<b>SubaruWRXSTI</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 3:59pm<b>Geoffelosophy</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 2:48am<b>LAS11</b> - the 05/18/2016 at 11:56pm<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 6:13am<b>Swarley4</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 10:18pm<b>EnderHorse</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 11:18am

Fucked!<b>ruudseriesx</b> - the 09/11/2016 at 6:47am<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 12:15pm<b>EnderHorse</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 5:18pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 1:46pm<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 12:52pm<b>vikingchick</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 12:13am<b>everton99</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 1:12am<b>morlogg</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 11:23pm<b>kantalita_claire</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 5:17am

iamabamf's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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iamabamf's favorite FMLs

Today, another of my dad's blind dates went bad, so I took him out for a beer. I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and when I came back, two guys were congratulating my dad on scoring such a hot piece of ass, and said the sex must be awesome. My dad played along with it. FML

by jonasister / 04/15/2012 at 2:43pm / Sweden (Skane Lan) / Intimacy

Today, I introduced my Spanish friend to a girl I've had a crush on for a long time. Because he only spoke Spanish and she only spoke English, I was the translator. The first thing he said to her was, "You are really pretty." I translated it as "I like other men." Later, they found out. FML

by needurlove / 04/15/2012 at 2:49am / United States (Idaho) / Love

Today, I went to a blood drive. The nurse taking my blood mentioned that she'd been called in on her day off, and she swore she wasn't drunk. I didn't know what to do, so I just smiled and blinked back tears as she savaged the vein in my arm. FML

by Anonymous / 04/14/2012 at 12:24pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I surprised my daughter by telling her that I'm going to treat the family to a trip to the Himalayas in a few months. She promptly threw a tantrum and listed her main reasons for not wanting us to go: "It's a freaking desert there," and, "I'll miss the new Spiderman movie." FML

by neverakid / 04/13/2012 at 9:01pm / United States / Kids

Today, I was Skyping with this kid, when his girlfriend started arguing with him. They do this every other week, and there was a bet on when they'd finally break up. I egged the guy on and told him not to take her shit. She ended up dumping him. Now I feel like an asshole, and all for a lousy $20. FML

by c*nt / 04/13/2012 at 7:14pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, a guy asked me why I'm single. As a joke, I told him that not only do I have a penis, but that it's so large that most men are intimidated by it. He wasn't impressed. And I actually wonder why I'm single. FML

by joolsie / 04/13/2012 at 9:11am / United Kingdom (York) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend saw the name "Melissa" on my phone's contact list. After refusing to tell her who it was, she accused me of being a cheater, broke up with me and stormed out of my house. Melissa is the name of a woman from Craigslist who was going to sell me an antique engagement ring. FML

by rejected / 04/13/2012 at 1:09am / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years texted me saying "I can't wait to f*ck later." I replied saying, "Couldn't we just spend time together?" Her response was, "What are you, a girl?" FML

by girly / 04/12/2012 at 12:06am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, I was eating a banana, and decided to practice my blowjob skills, since my boyfriend is always complaining that I'm bad at giving head. Let's just say my lungs now have their daily dose of potassium. FML

by potassiumgirl / 04/11/2012 at 3:53pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was eating a banana, and decided to practice my blowjob skills, since my boyfriend is always complaining that I'm bad at giving head. Let's just say my lungs now have their daily dose of potassium. FML

by potassiumgirl / 04/11/2012 at 3:53pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that my boyfriend is afraid of female orgasms. Right as I was about to climax, he panicked, pulled out, and ran into the bathroom. FML

by displeased / 04/05/2012 at 2:47am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, I posted on Facebook saying I'm in a new relationship. One of my buddies said, "You're cheating on Jill?" My girlfriend saw this and went completely nuts, not giving me a chance to explain that "Jill" is just a euphemism for your hand. FML

by jackmehoffa / 04/03/2012 at 2:10pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love

Today, I confided to my dad that my girlfriend had dumped me for another guy. He said "good" and explained that given how overpopulated the planet is, he's actually disappointed that I'm not gay. His advice was: "just wank it off and move on". FML

by sad / 03/30/2012 at 6:21pm / United Kingdom (Cardiff) / Love

Today, I spent 3 hours trying to read my dog's mind. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2012 at 2:57am / United States / Animals

Today, I tried to impress my girlfriend by vaulting over the side of a stairway rail parkour-style. Now I feel like I almost broke my legs, and judging by her hysterical laughter, she considers me more of a fool than a stud. FML

by Anonymous / 03/23/2012 at 7:51pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Love