About iamabamf : Everything I do is motherfucking awesome.
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Today, my parents decided on my punishment for failing an English test. No deodorant for a week. They think they're so hilarious, they told all their friends and now it's all over Facebook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19723) - you deserved it (2635)
On 04/30/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by sockmonkey (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was walking home, when I saw a homeless man trying to tear the wallet out of another guy's hand. I can't stand bums, so I smacked him across the jaw. That's when the other one kneed me in the balls and made off with my wallet as well. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8382) - you deserved it (25846)
On 04/30/2012 at 5:46pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I finally built up the courage to confess my love to the girl of my dreams. She turned me down. When I asked her about all the recent receptive behavior toward me, she replied, "I thought it'd be funny." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24004) - you deserved it (1740)
On 04/30/2012 at 12:01pm - love - by HighasaCloud (man) - United States (Indiana)
Today, while at work as a cashier, I tried to be sweet and ID an elderly man buying a bottle of wine. He responded by calling me a "blind-ass bitch" and calling my manager for "harassing" him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9618) - you deserved it (16241)
On 04/30/2012 at 5:24am - work - by zomg - United States (Florida)
Today, after a lot of begging, I finally convinced my husband to shave all of his pubes off. Now I can't even look at it without laughing, and he's mad at me for making him do it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4177) - you deserved it (33295)
On 04/30/2012 at 4:25am - intimacy - by kdehshaden (woman) - United States
Today, I asked the girl I'm madly in love with out to dinner. When she asked me if I would pay, I jokingly said, "Well, that depends on how the date goes." She looked me up and down and said, "No thanks then." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13472) - you deserved it (9440)
On 04/29/2012 at 7:56pm - love - by -insert clever nickname here- - United States (Washington)
Today, I drove for hours to attend a martial arts tournament, and then I waited ages for it to finally start. I lost in less than a minute. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16796) - you deserved it (4165)
On 04/29/2012 at 3:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Dakota)
Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19343) - you deserved it (1752)
On 04/29/2012 at 2:31pm - love - by davincourt (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. She didnt look away and we stared at each other for a while; then she asked me what I wanted from McDonalds. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26621) - you deserved it (6229)
On 04/29/2012 at 11:10am - intimacy - by ShadowJack - United States
Today, the novelty of shaving a heart into my pubic hair for my wife vanished, when I woke up to find a collection of scabs around my pubes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9834) - you deserved it (8560)
On 04/28/2012 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by Matt (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I fell and hit my head on hard concrete. When I went to the emergency room for a CT Scan, the nurse hit me in the head with an IV pole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19467) - you deserved it (1207)
On 04/28/2012 at 2:52am - health - by mark807 - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my wife woke me up by giving my erect penis a Chinese burn. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19970) - you deserved it (2119)
On 04/28/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by poo4brains - New Zealand (Canterbury)
Today, I was walking down the street, when an aging lady bumped into me and fell over. I helped her up and she thanked me for being "such a nice young man". It was only an hour later as I was in line at the store that I realized she had pickpocketed me of my wallet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20777) - you deserved it (1415)
On 04/27/2012 at 9:55pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I came home earlier than usual, only to find my wife having sex with some guy on our bed. Her reaction to being confronted was to look me dead in the eyes and to scream and scream until I got so freaked out that I left. It's her house, and I'm sitting in a library with no idea what to do. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36481) - you deserved it (2415)
On 04/27/2012 at 9:04pm - intimacy - by yosenfal (man) - United Kingdom (Plymouth)
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. After she left, they told me they disapprove of her because of her supposedly lower social class. Now I have to either dump her or lose the money they set aside to pay for my university tuition. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26022) - you deserved it (2211)
On 04/27/2012 at 2:01pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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