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iamabamf

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iamabamf
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3980
  • Number of comments : 99
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 5 posted

About iamabamf : Why can't I change my username? Fuck.

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iamabamf's favorite FMLs

Today, a customer called me "chink eyes", "dog eater", "bloody Chinese communist" and "ching chong." I'm black. FML

#20919376
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51063) - you deserved it (3197)

On 10/13/2013 at 9:14pm - work - by mustabeendrugs (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I cleaned up my brother's room, since he's moved out. Under the bed I found a Doritos bag full of used condoms. FML

#20749135
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52719) - you deserved it (5832)

On 06/26/2013 at 9:02pm - intimacy - by the_lonely_life - United States

Today, I tried to explain to my cat why I was single, but then I realized why. FML

#20733893
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40772) - you deserved it (19519)

On 06/18/2013 at 7:27pm - animals - by CatLover<3 - United States (Texas)

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

#20637691
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58162) - you deserved it (8823)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, during the countdown to midnight, I looked for my girlfriend so I could kiss her as 2013 began. I found her just in time to see her making out with some guy she swore was "only a friend." FML

#20435586
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38668) - you deserved it (2077)

On 01/01/2013 at 2:50am - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, a thirty-something guy swaggered into my workplace. He was wearing shutter shades and torn jeans, and claimed to be our new boss. I called security to throw him out, at which point he produced his ID and let me know I'd be attending an employee review session next week. FML

#20039859
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18364) - you deserved it (6482)

On 08/24/2012 at 8:20pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I invited my girlfriend over to a family lunch, planning to propose to her at just the right moment. My family was in on it, including my apparently disapproving mom, who kept causing a scene to grab my girlfriend's attention every time I went to pull out the ring. FML

#20016767
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21148) - you deserved it (1690)

On 08/12/2012 at 11:49am - love - by jake (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was watching a movie alone with my girlfriend. She shifted positions as I put my arm around her, and ended up kneeing me in the crotch and shouldering me in the throat simultaneously. FML

#20016514
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16901) - you deserved it (1725)

On 08/12/2012 at 5:23am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, a customer punched me in the face for repeating their order back to them because they thought I was making fun of their speech impediment. I have the same speech impediment. FML

#19982373
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32049) - you deserved it (1713)

On 07/24/2012 at 9:37pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was in line at the pharmacy when the man in front of me asked if I wanted to see a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. Before I had time to answer, he showed me a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. FML

#19981127
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23823) - you deserved it (1906)

On 07/24/2012 at 5:51am - misc - by Uncircumcised Penis - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to my local coffee shop. I soon witnessed the girl making my drink apparently dislodge a wedgie from her ass-crack and then sneeze into her hands. When I confronted her, she loudly accused me of "visually molesting" her. FML

#19974801
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18907) - you deserved it (1362)

On 07/22/2012 at 12:48pm - misc - by bitchimgay (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I auditioned for the role of Rizzo in a local production of Grease. The director told me I wasn't tough enough, and that my persona too sweet and childlike for the part. I asked if I should instead try out to play Sandy. He replied "I was being nice. Honestly, you're ugly and can't act." FML

#19952455
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21015) - you deserved it (3016)

On 07/18/2012 at 12:02am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I told a patient that we needed to collect a stool sample. I left the room momentarily to retrieve what the patient would need. He apparently didn't need anything besides the counter in the exam room. FML

#19951695
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18751) - you deserved it (1776)

On 07/17/2012 at 8:54pm - work - by TimeForACareerChange (man) - United States

Today, I woke up with a pimple on my eyelid. Not only is it impossible to cover up with makeup, I can't pop it either. Now I'll be spending the rest of the day trying not to blink. FML

#19945727
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17725) - you deserved it (1959)

On 07/16/2012 at 2:25pm - misc - by CantBlink - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went to an amusement park with my ex in the hopes of re-kindling our relationship. While taking a break at the petting zoo, I got rammed in the balls by a goat. She laughed and patted the goat. FML

#19920201
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18549) - you deserved it (5340)

On 07/10/2012 at 7:10pm - animals - by Nomoreballs (man) - Canada (Manitoba)



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