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i_wuz_nver_here

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i_wuz_nver_here
  • Town/Country : Seattle, Washington,, America
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 13937
  • Number of comments : 571
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About i_wuz_nver_here : I was bored so I made this account. Hi.

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i_wuz_nver_here's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw Avatar in iMax 3D. Towards the end of the movie I jump, yelled, and spilled my drink all over the people in front of me because I thought a burning piece of ash landed on my leg. FML

#7420150
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7270) - you deserved it (37600)

On 01/18/2010 at 2:39pm - misc - by burnedboy (man) - United States

Today, I saw Avatar in iMax 3D. Towards the end of the movie I jump, yelled, and spilled my drink all over the people in front of me because I thought a burning piece of ash landed on my leg. FML

#7420150
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7270) - you deserved it (37600)

On 01/18/2010 at 2:39pm - misc - by burnedboy (man) - United States

Today, while babysitting a six year old boy, he asked me if I could show him my "boobies." I said no, that wouldn't be very appropriate. Suddenly, he pulled down his pants/undies and pointed to his package while exclaiming, "Look, my penis is on again!" It was pointing RIGHT at me. FML

#7404915
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31642) - you deserved it (3107)

On 01/17/2010 at 7:32pm - kids - by Michele (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I hurried into the bank to cash in the $5,000 check my grandparents had given me for college money. I found out that instead of my name, they wrote 'our sweet iddle pumpkinbutt'. I couldn't make eye contact with anyone after. FML

#7401501
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22013) - you deserved it (3981)

On 01/17/2010 at 4:08pm - misc - by pumpkinbutt - Sent from mobile version

Today, my grandma told me to fuck off when I tried to help her with the dishes. FML

#7391871
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27234) - you deserved it (5670)

On 01/17/2010 at 1:31am - love - by volleyballgirl12 - Sent from mobile version

Today, my grandma told me to fuck off when I tried to help her with the dishes. FML

#7391871
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27234) - you deserved it (5670)

On 01/17/2010 at 1:31am - love - by volleyballgirl12 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was telling my cousin about my boyfriend, who plays guitar and sings very well, has dark hair, and wears girl pants. After telling her these things, she's quiet for a moment before she looks at me and says, "So... You're dating a Jonas brother?" FML

#7380443
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6458) - you deserved it (29364)

On 01/16/2010 at 4:05pm - misc - by kikinemo (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I found some pictures of the boy I have a crush on online. Not only is he a crossdresser, but he's also a better looking woman than I am. FML

#7353412
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24412) - you deserved it (5216)

On 01/15/2010 at 3:02am - love - by Rin (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML

#7339757
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23545) - you deserved it (4523)

On 01/14/2010 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by scubai (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I realized that the amount of time it takes my boyfriend to get an erection takes longer than the actual sex. FML

#7325738
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15254) - you deserved it (2356)

On 01/13/2010 at 8:02pm - intimacy - by cantgetitupcantgetiton (woman) - United States

Today, my brother and his friend ambushed me, tied me to a chair, and put a sock in my mouth. My mom found me 10 minutes later, took the sock out, and asked, "Why are you tied to a chair?" I told her what happened. She looked at me, laughed, stuffed the sock back in my mouth, and left. FML

#7319771
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31868) - you deserved it (4131)

On 01/13/2010 at 2:36pm - misc - by boundandgagged (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out the guy I've been seeing for 3 months lives at home with his parents. He's 30. They live in a '50+ only' housing complex and he sneaks in the side door. FML

#7313507
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22010) - you deserved it (2757)

On 01/13/2010 at 1:11am - love - by ilu.xo (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my crush of over a year came over for me to take her on our first date. Today was also the day my drunk parents decided to dance the chicken dance in our front yard, naked. FML

#7278276
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31839) - you deserved it (2622)

On 01/11/2010 at 1:12pm - love - by JK2010 (man) - Israel (Hefa)

Today, while playing spin the bottle, my two spins landed on two really pretty girls. The first girl I missed and kissed her chin. The second girl I headbutted and gave a nosebleed. FML

#7258041
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9099) - you deserved it (28771)

On 01/10/2010 at 1:13pm - love - by Olihime (man) - United Kingdom (Leicester)

Today, I was at a band practice. The band was talking to each other with language like "cadence", "resolution" and "consecutive fifths". When they spoke to me, they used terms like "tick", "bong", "ticky bong"; and "bongy tick". Musically, I feel like a baboon. FML

#7233088
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18555) - you deserved it (5875)

On 01/09/2010 at 8:48am - misc - by Fredgruff (man) - United Kingdom (London)



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