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i_wuz_nver_here

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i_wuz_nver_here
  • Town/Country : Seattle, Washington,, America
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 14016
  • Number of comments : 571
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About i_wuz_nver_here : I was bored so I made this account. Hi.

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i_wuz_nver_here's favorite FMLs

Today, I took some friends out to the woods to show them a natural spring. I explained to them that the water bubbles up from under ground, and that it's clean and tasty. I bent down and drank a few hefty handfuls only to look up and see a dead raccoon floating near me. FML

#12911536
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17106) - you deserved it (15398)

On 09/05/2010 at 1:22am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, while I was running in a cross country meet, a bug flew into my right eye. Then, a bug flew into my left eye. Not wanting to lose a neck-and-neck sprint, I tried to run blind. I hit a pole. FML

#12906050
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24711) - you deserved it (7662)

On 09/04/2010 at 7:43pm - misc - by ow (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while I was running in a cross country meet, a bug flew into my right eye. Then, a bug flew into my left eye. Not wanting to lose a neck-and-neck sprint, I tried to run blind. I hit a pole. FML

#12906050
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24711) - you deserved it (7662)

On 09/04/2010 at 7:43pm - misc - by ow (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I witnessed my girlfriend scratch her crotch and then sniff her fingers. FML

#12817288
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34617) - you deserved it (11266)

On 08/30/2010 at 3:30am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my dad walked in on me singing "Bohemian Rhapsody", while spinning in circles with the cat in my arms. I thought I was home alone. FML

#12797830
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11201) - you deserved it (24433)

On 08/29/2010 at 12:54am - animals - by Hobbsie - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

#12677495
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39233) - you deserved it (11947)

On 08/22/2010 at 2:58am - kids - by Bailey - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

#12677495
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39233) - you deserved it (11947)

On 08/22/2010 at 2:58am - kids - by Bailey - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

#12677495
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39233) - you deserved it (11947)

On 08/22/2010 at 2:58am - kids - by Bailey - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I pulled a muscle in my arm while wiping my own butt. FML

#12657778
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15165) - you deserved it (21902)

On 08/21/2010 at 2:09am - health - by clitorasaurus (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, all the while my friends were over, my mom took too many of her pills and walked around the house nude. She then bit me. FML

#12624086
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35019) - you deserved it (3006)

On 08/19/2010 at 11:48am - misc - by feartheend511 - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend admitted that he finds his car more attractive than me. FML

#12623865
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28427) - you deserved it (6155)

On 08/19/2010 at 11:28am - love - by yup okay (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I discovered that my name literally means "burden". This wouldn't be so bad if both my mother and father knew this when they named me. FML

#12596251
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22323) - you deserved it (2396)

On 08/18/2010 at 12:30am - misc - by Anon (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, the ice cream truck went by my house for the seventh time today, as it has for the last seven days of my fasting. FML

#12563686
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27072) - you deserved it (7560)

On 08/16/2010 at 4:35pm - misc - by IceCreamCraver (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my friends were all sharing sweet things their boyfriends had shared with them. After hearing "he says I look pretty without makeup" or "he promises we'll get married one day", I realized that the only compliment he's given me is that my laughter "sounds like a squirrel having a seizure." FML

#12552157
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26301) - you deserved it (4754)

On 08/16/2010 at 1:03am - love - by 86145 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, one of my mum's dinner guests walked in on me and my boyfriend kissing, only to let out a horrified scream. Apparently my mum had introduced my boyfriend as her son, as she is embarrassed of my real brother. FML

#12524990
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33172) - you deserved it (2314)

On 08/14/2010 at 7:23pm - love - by incestastic - Canada (Ontario)



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