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i_wuz_nver_here

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i_wuz_nver_here
  • Town/Country : Seattle, Washington,, America
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 13875
  • Number of comments : 571
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About i_wuz_nver_here : I was bored so I made this account. Hi.

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i_wuz_nver_here's favorite FMLs

Today, I went over to my friend's house. Her 5 year old son answered the door and when he saw me said, 'oh great, it's YOU' and slammed the door in my face. FML

#13300010
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22533) - you deserved it (4268)

On 10/03/2010 at 3:40am - kids - by notyouagain (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was at the beach with my parents. They were walking hand in hand, when they spotted a crab. My Dad turned to my Mum and said "Oh, must've crawled out of my pubes!" they both laughed and kissed. I don't think they realized I was within hearing distance. FML

#13287262
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25874) - you deserved it (2895)

On 10/02/2010 at 9:12am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, when I stopped at a light, I tossed a banana peel into a field along the side of the road. The man behind me got out of his car, picked up the banana peel and threw it back into my car at me. When I tried to tell him it was biodegradable, he told me to "stop making up words." FML

#13274886
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21529) - you deserved it (27144)

On 10/01/2010 at 9:47am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I walked past two guys on the street. I heard one of them whisper, "Jeez, that girl looks like Donald Trump." FML

#13268131
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21657) - you deserved it (3193)

On 09/30/2010 at 8:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I walked past two guys on the street. I heard one of them whisper, "Jeez, that girl looks like Donald Trump." FML

#13268131
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21657) - you deserved it (3193)

On 09/30/2010 at 8:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I nervously introduced my mother to my new boyfriend. I had to sit and watch her flirt with him for an hour. When I took her in the other room and confronted her about it, she said, "Don't you dare ruin this for me!" FML

#13241865
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33815) - you deserved it (2142)

On 09/28/2010 at 10:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Maine)

Today, I nervously introduced my mother to my new boyfriend. I had to sit and watch her flirt with him for an hour. When I took her in the other room and confronted her about it, she said, "Don't you dare ruin this for me!" FML

#13241865
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33815) - you deserved it (2142)

On 09/28/2010 at 10:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Maine)

Today, I hurt my jaw after I got hit by a car. While receiving medical attention, the paramedic accidentally punched me in the face. FML

#13233409
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26072) - you deserved it (2233)

On 09/28/2010 at 7:37am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands (Gelderland)

Today, after I got off work, as I walked into the house, I noticed something running across the floor towards me and out of complete terror I kicked it halfway across my living room, not knowing what it was. Turns out it was my roommate's new puppy. FML

#13167367
310 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11056) - you deserved it (42621)

On 09/23/2010 at 7:01am - misc - by nackpattywhackgiveadogabone (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I ran over my neighbors' cat. I didn't want it to look like I killed it, so I put it under my other neighbor's car so it would look like they ran over it. The cat's owners were watching me. FML

#13137769
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6994) - you deserved it (69107)

On 09/21/2010 at 12:49am - animals - by awesome - United States (Arizona)

Today, I ran over my neighbors' cat. I didn't want it to look like I killed it, so I put it under my other neighbor's car so it would look like they ran over it. The cat's owners were watching me. FML

#13137769
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6994) - you deserved it (69107)

On 09/21/2010 at 12:49am - animals - by awesome - United States (Arizona)

Today, I grabbed a handful of crackers from the kitchen, only to find it crawling with bugs. Apparently, my brother had made the same discovery earlier, but put the box of crackers back in the cupboard anyway. FML

#13129116
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23225) - you deserved it (2482)

On 09/20/2010 at 3:26pm - animals - by thanksbro - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was on my way home on an airplane. The guy I had to sit next to was reading a book with naked girls in it. About 15 minutes into the flight, he had an erection and started to giggle. It was a 2 hour flight. FML

#13124550
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30533) - you deserved it (2815)

On 09/20/2010 at 3:16am - intimacy - by Thomas - United States (Oregon)

Today, while grocery shopping, my Dad asked me what I wanted for 'Din-Dins' while scratching his nuts. In a crowded aisle. Wearing short shorts. FML

#13071256
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25702) - you deserved it (2620)

On 09/16/2010 at 5:04am - misc - by itchybollos - Australia

Today, I met a new guy at work who would not stop hitting on me. We ended up on a six hour shift together watching a pool, so we were wearing nothing but bathing suits when he began grabbing me inappropriately. When I confided in my female coworker about it, she told me he was her husband. FML



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