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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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iValerest

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iValerest
  • Town/Country : Olney, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 20 August 1998 (13 years)
  • Number of visits : 493
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About iValerest : I shall write this later! MWAHAHAHAHAAA!! Wait, what? Narwhal.

iValerest's last visitors

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iValerest's favorite FMLs

Today, I got bitch-slapped by a walrus at Sea Life Park. FML

#11841759 (226)

I agree, your life sucks (30162) - you deserved it (7290)

On 07/13/2010 at 12:34am - misc - by Betchsadface - United States

Today, in math class, I had the urge to fart. I had the bright idea that if I dropped my textbook and farted at the same time, nobody would hear it. I dropped my textbook, everyone looked at me, then I farted. Loudly. FML

#11389778 (261)

I agree, your life sucks (13590) - you deserved it (41183)

On 06/22/2010 at 9:41pm - health - by fartwoman - United States (California)

Today, after leaving work at 10 pm, I took a shortcut to the highway. After getting lost, my GPS informed me that the service was unavailable and I should try back in an hour. This occurred moments before I ran out of gas. FML

#8861127 (73)

I agree, your life sucks (13436) - you deserved it (5300)

On 03/06/2010 at 1:16am - misc - by Lost... (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, an elderly lady swore at me for not holding a door open for her. The door in question was automatic. FML

#8800803 (121)

I agree, your life sucks (17490) - you deserved it (1312)

On 03/03/2010 at 3:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)

Today, after 25 years of marriage and 2 children, I was served with divorce papers. It turns out my 51 year old, soon to be ex, has been having an affair with the 24 year old tutor I hired to help our daughter bring her grades up. They are in love and want to start a new family together as soon as possible. FML

#8400921 (242)

I agree, your life sucks (30400) - you deserved it (1524)

On 02/18/2010 at 4:51am - love - by brokenhearted (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because of my dad constantly hitting on her. Not because she was disgusted, but because she wants to date him. FML

#7584651 (176)

I agree, your life sucks (39369) - you deserved it (1669)

On 01/26/2010 at 2:35am - love - by Junior (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I flew a toy helicopter into my face. FML

#7436453 (127)

I agree, your life sucks (5121) - you deserved it (20500)

On 01/19/2010 at 12:42pm - misc - by magicalDEATH (man) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I met my new college room-mate. He then introduced me to his imaginary friend. FML

#7423840 (89)

I agree, your life sucks (19770) - you deserved it (1617)

On 01/18/2010 at 7:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was on a job trial at the local pet shop and, naturally, was doing all the disgusting jobs. As I was cleaning the kittens' litter in the cat enclosure, someone thought it would be funny to lock me in there. I sat in a giant cage in the middle of the store with people laughing at me. FML

#7373793 (59)

I agree, your life sucks (19769) - you deserved it (1835)

On 01/16/2010 at 4:10am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend was going to propose to me about three months ago. I was completely surprised and asked why he didn't. At that time, I had told him to stop looking at me like that and go buy me some damn tacos. I was 2 months pregnant then. Now he wants to wait a couple of years. FML

#7321646 (236)

I agree, your life sucks (6818) - you deserved it (24421)

On 01/13/2010 at 4:40pm - love - by cowgurl91 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I stepped outside for a smoke. It was 1 a.m. Thinking no one was around, I let out a series of loud, nasty-sounding farts. I looked over to my left to see the neighbor, whom I've never met, also smoking, and staring at me. That was his first impression of me. FML

#6915702 (95)

I agree, your life sucks (5898) - you deserved it (18834)

On 12/24/2009 at 2:00am - misc - by FlGirl (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my wife entered in an ugliest sweater competition at her work. She wore a plain white sweater with a picture of my face printed on it. She came home with first prize. FML

#6811696 (56)

I agree, your life sucks (25950) - you deserved it (2488)

On 12/18/2009 at 2:52pm - misc - by mclovin09 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got in an elevator at a hotel. Just as the door was closing, somebody banged into the door and stuck their hand through. I yelled, "What, are you retarded?!" The doors then opened to reveal a mentally handicapped boy with his parents standing behind him. FML

#6792235 (156)

I agree, your life sucks (8628) - you deserved it (31913)

On 12/17/2009 at 11:38am - misc - by Mike (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I set up a miniature nativity scene in my apartment. Three hours ago, my dog decided it would be a good idea to eat baby Jesus. Two hours ago, the vet laughed and said not to worry because I would 'have him back in time for Christmas'. FML

#6791199 (113)

I agree, your life sucks (15881) - you deserved it (3594)

On 12/17/2009 at 9:32am - animals - by gettingacat (woman) - United States (California)

Today, was my birthday. I have been heavily hinting that I want an iPhone. I opened my present from my parents and found an iPhone box. Ecstatic, I quickly opened it. Apparently, my parents thought it would be funny to wrap my present, a $10 iTunes gift card, in the box my Dad's iPhone came in. FML

#6695365 (160)

I agree, your life sucks (22934) - you deserved it (5318)

On 12/10/2009 at 3:38pm - money - by muggle68 (man) - United States (North Carolina)