About iSurf : I'm kind of a really chill hipster. Disclaimer: I'm a stupid person, but I hate stupid people. Hypocritical, right? 'Bout time I get back on, eh? I still won't be on as much as I used to....I have a life, mate.
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iSurf's favorite FMLs
Today, I had to say "Put away your burrito," "that ruler is not a light saber," and "stop making dog noises" all in the same sentence at work. I teach Advanced Placement Calculus to high school seniors. FML
by Anonymous / 08/20/2011 at 3:42am / United States (Texas) / Work
by candymansvan17 / 08/17/2011 at 5:50pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous
Today, I got my tongue pierced, then went to a pet store. A clerk came up to ask if I needed help. I showed him I already had some fish, and said, "No thanks." He must have thought I was "special," as he bent down and in a baby voice, said "You got fishy? FISHY FISHY FISHY!" while poking the bag. FML
by aprilfools22 / 08/17/2011 at 4:13am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke up exhausted because a croaking frog had kept me awake the night before. This has happened every night for the past week, and no matter how far away I take the frog, it always ends up sitting in the same place the next morning. FML
by froggylicious / 08/16/2011 at 2:18pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
by Anon / 08/16/2011 at 2:27am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by squishylog / 08/12/2011 at 3:44am / United States (California) / Animals
by TuteSweet / 08/12/2011 at 2:17am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
Today, thinking I was alone in a public bathroom, I started singing the words to my favorite song. A minute later that I heard a toilet flush, so I just sat there petrified. The other person sarcastically picked up the singing from where I left off. FML
by bathroomgirl / 08/11/2011 at 12:09pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Ser17 / 08/10/2011 at 1:47pm / United States / Animals
Today, I found out that the landscaping job I started three weeks ago is actually for an illicit business run by a hippie who pissed away the entire payroll to fund his drug habit. He has no way of coughing up the $900 he owes me. I'm broke as hell, and my electricity is now going to get cut off. FML
by Anonymous / 07/08/2011 at 8:12pm / United States / Work
Today, I peeked through my window and trained a pair of binoculars on my neighbour's house. Every night without fail, he ends up standing in front of his window topless to flex his muscles. This time, I was surprised to instead find a note taped to the window saying, "Sorry, I'm out tonight." FML
Today, I called my phone company to get some answers about my phone bill. I was okay with being put on hold. In fact, I was on hold for so long, that the music stopped playing. When someone finally answered they told me to call back tomorrow. All my phones disconnected an hour later. FML
by Broguy / 07/05/2011 at 10:20pm / Canada / Money
by Anonymous / 07/05/2011 at 6:28pm / United States (Missouri) / Health
by chawlay / 07/05/2011 at 10:04am / United States (New York) / Work
by Anonymous / 07/02/2011 at 12:46am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Transportation
- 1Today, I've stopped smoking, lost 30 pounds, taken several painful tests, and checked my ovulation… 2Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had… 3Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went…