iOceanus

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Offline (the 02/04/2015 at 5:25pm)

iOceanus

6Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5037
  • Number of comments : 289
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About iOceanus : I enjoy reading manga, watching anime, and playing video games. Otaku and proud! ^_^☆ Send me a message, and I'll entertain you! I'll talk about anything, really. :P Although, I'm usually lurking on FML at night! Sayonara mina-san!
( ´ ▽ ` )ノ

The bitterest truth is better than the sweetest lie.
-Anonymous

You reap what you sow. -Many people

Do or do not, there is no try. -Master Yoda

True freedom lies within ones thoughts.
-Anonymous

iOceanus's page activity

Visits<b>_Adog2645</b> - the 09/14/2016 at 2:09pm<b>Allornone</b> - the 07/28/2016 at 9:45pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 12:46pm<b>sadblufly</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 7:34pm<b>Jiratias</b> - the 06/07/2016 at 1:47pm<b>IFearMyDoctor</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 2:25am<b>SSJ4Asterisk</b> - the 05/24/2016 at 7:16pm<b>courtly25</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 7:16am<b>collector12334</b> - the 04/23/2016 at 8:35am<b>llamadramas</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 12:33am<b>walker9879</b> - the 04/03/2016 at 10:32pm<b>APHPrussia</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 2:30pm<b>suprisebitch</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 2:25pm<b>Salvanoi</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 8:01am<b>StarOfDoom</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 4:50pm<b>TheGamingGamer</b> - the 02/09/2016 at 5:43pm<b>jamaarlove</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 9:59pm<b>monkey8970</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 6:51am

Fucked!<b>Jiratias</b> - the 06/07/2016 at 7:48pm<b>SSJ4Asterisk</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 1:16am<b>ughlifesuck</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 10:58am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 4:28am<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 5:33am<b>salyhahaha</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 10:56pm

iOceanus's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of iOceanus's badges

iOceanus's favorite FMLs

Today, at a romantic dinner my boyfriend was treating me to, the waiter brought a "Will you marry me?" cake out with candles and sparklers. I probably should have checked that they'd brought it to the right table before dramatically screaming "Yes!" and jumping into my boyfriend's arms. They hadn't. FML

by franky / 03/25/2013 at 5:45pm / Germany (Niedersachsen) / Love

Today, I got so drunk that I tasered myself in the balls as a joke, fell down my friend's porch stairs and rolled out into the street. FML

by anon / 03/25/2013 at 2:31pm / United States / Health

Today, my friend asked to borrow my new laptop to email his college professor. When he returned it, it had a virus on it, and I had to fish out two pubic hairs that were sticking out between the keys. FML

by grossed out / 03/25/2013 at 2:25pm / United Kingdom (Peterborough) / Miscellaneous

Today, I bought an expensive razor that's supposed to be great. My roommate asked if she could borrow it, and as her legs just looked like they needed touching up, I said sure. After a strangely long amount of time, she came back, thanked me and left. Her legs were still hairy. FML

by bleach / 03/24/2013 at 1:30am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the airport after saying goodbye to my, for some reason, giggling boyfriend. I learnt why he was so cheerful when I opened my purse in front of the guards, only to find pink-furry handcuffs, and a huge dildo. They pretended not to know what it was. FML

by Anonymous / 03/23/2013 at 11:21am / Norway (Sor-Trondelag) / Intimacy

Today, a small fly flew straight up into my nose. I spent 10 minutes trying to blow/scratch/pick it out to no avail. I can still feel it moving. FML

by WTFLY / 03/23/2013 at 4:17am / United States (Hawaii) / Miscellaneous

Today, while making love to my boyfriend for the first time, I moaned his name. He freaked out over how I wasn't over my ex, and angrily left. They have the same name. FML

by nraecher / 03/23/2013 at 12:43am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, my grandson visited me, and asked if I had any pictures of myself from when I was a little girl. I happily looked for a few photos to give him, asking what had piqued his curiosity. He replied that he wanted some for a presentation he's doing on the Middle Ages. FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2013 at 9:19pm / France (Lorraine) / Miscellaneous

Today, my psycho abstinence-only sex ed teacher claimed condoms give 50% protection at most against pregnancy. I couldn't help but correct her. She apologized for her "mistake", saying, "It's just that we're not ALL sluts, Kara." Now everyone thinks I'm a raging whore. FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2013 at 8:34pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my 2-year-old daughter and my 27-year-old husband both woke me up in the early hours of the morning. Their complaints were the same: they'd both wet the bed. FML

by sickness and health my sphincter / 03/22/2013 at 5:53pm / Singapore / Miscellaneous

Today, there was a new girl in one of my classes. We both corrected a classmate on his grammar, so, trying to make a new friend, I leaned back to her and said, "Haha, fellow Grammar Nazi?" She gave me a disgusted look and told me she was Jewish. FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2013 at 6:43am / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, I was talking to my boss and he said I was awesome. He went to fist bump me and I missed. FML

by missedfistbump / 03/20/2013 at 10:31am / United States / Work

Today, for the sixth time in a row, I was driving my kid to school and he made me late for work. Why? He was whacking off instead of getting ready. FML

by Why son, why? / 03/20/2013 at 7:07am / United States / Intimacy

Today, a cute guy who works at the mall winked at me. When I met up with my boyfriend, I bragged to him about it. His response was, "Don't flatter yourself, he winked at me too." FML

by amberrenee91 / 03/18/2013 at 11:29pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I had an interview for a job I really wanted. On my resume, I wrote that I speak conversational Spanish, although I don't. When I arrived for the interview, my interviewer decided to conduct it in Spanish. FML

by nohablaespanol / 03/18/2013 at 7:42pm / United States (Texas) / Work