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iOceanus

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iOceanus

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2296
  • Number of comments : 286
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About iOceanus : I enjoy reading manga, watching anime, and playing video games. Otaku and proud! ^_^☆ Send me a message, and I'll entertain you! I'll talk about anything, really. :P Although, I'm usually lurking on FML at night! Sayonara mina-san!
( ´ ▽ ` )ノ

The bitterest truth is better than the sweetest lie.
-Anonymous

You reap what you sow. -Many people

Do or do not, there is no try. -Master Yoda

True freedom lies within ones thoughts.
-Anonymous

iOceanus's page activity

Visits<b>StupidMonkey497</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 3:49pm<b>Foto_1</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 12:08pm<b>Michaelmore</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 9:11pm<b>PerSueTwo513</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 4:45pm<b>The_Shrimp52</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 1:18am<b>AE101</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 10:21pm<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 3:15pm<b>simplysarcastics</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 11:58pm<b>TheMrJoee</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 8:07pm<b>harlz31</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 6:19pm<b>ThisDirtyDreamer</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 5:31am<b>Ins3rtEpicName</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 11:03pm<b>forevralone</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 3:00pm<b>oxythemoron</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 2:54am<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 9:10pm<b>lovefrog</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 10:36am<b>WoldowJR</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 9:56am<b>Ciarasdfghjkl_</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 6:25am

iOceanus's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of iOceanus's badges

iOceanus's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a new dentist. You know how most dentists play soft, relaxing music? Well this guy seems to like rap a lot, and it's kinda hard getting your teeth cleaned to the sound of bullets going off. FML

#21131626
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38726) - you deserved it (4261)

On 05/05/2014 at 5:51pm - health - by randomusername99 - United States (New York)

Today, I was glued to the toilet all day, gushing fountains of crap, due to my own bad cooking. It got so bad that I ran out of toilet paper and had to desperately jump in the shower and stay there for nearly two hours. I can't even feel my own asshole any more. FML

#21130490
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41244) - you deserved it (10490)

On 05/04/2014 at 1:17pm - health - by Numbass123 (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was glued to the toilet all day, gushing fountains of crap, due to my own bad cooking. It got so bad that I ran out of toilet paper and had to desperately jump in the shower and stay there for nearly two hours. I can't even feel my own asshole any more. FML

#21130490
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41244) - you deserved it (10490)

On 05/04/2014 at 1:17pm - health - by Numbass123 (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was in the car with my boyfriend, who was driving down the highway with the windows down. All of a sudden, everything went black. A cattle truck had sped past, and I had been hit by cow faeces travelling at 110km an hour. My boyfriend was hysterical. None of it hit him. FML

#21127873
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48607) - you deserved it (4419)

On 05/01/2014 at 10:17am - animals - by Felicityfrank (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, an old guy phoned the cops on my daughter because she was drawing with chalk on the sidewalk. Apparently, he thinks it's vandalism. FML

#21125786
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43744) - you deserved it (3402)

On 04/28/2014 at 10:39pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I farted so loudly I not only woke myself up, but my husband as well. He mistook my gas for someone trying to break in and insisted on checking the whole house. I was too embarrassed to tell him the truth. FML

#21125262
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42101) - you deserved it (8564)

On 04/28/2014 at 12:58pm - misc - by gassymomma (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had just sat down in the lobby of my doctor's office when my phone alerted me that I had a friend request. I checked; it was from some girl from high school. I muttered to myself, "I don't want to be your friend." I then heard a gasp. She was sitting across from me. FML

Today, the man sitting next to me on the train tried to sneak a dead cat into my bag while I was sleeping. FML

#21121912
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42506) - you deserved it (3540)

On 04/24/2014 at 4:52pm - animals - by now have a cat - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend drove 20 miles to come see me. The closest we got to intimacy was him showing me how he could unlock his iPhone 5s with his penis. FML

#21118643
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48415) - you deserved it (7049)

On 04/21/2014 at 12:04am - intimacy - by Taylor - United States (Iowa)

Today, my guide dog sneezed so hard that it slammed its head on the floor and knocked itself out. I have to trust this dog with my life. FML

#21117679
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51119) - you deserved it (4485)

On 04/20/2014 at 12:03am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Idaho)

Today, I work at a food joint as a chef, and a customer found a long strand of hair in her food. The manager blamed me, even though I'm bald. FML

#21117573
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43843) - you deserved it (3187)

On 04/19/2014 at 10:39pm - work - by notmine (man) - India (Delhi)

Today, I found out that my father faked his whole "mid-life crisis", just so he could gain my trust and get me to admit that I smoke weed, and to tell him who I buy it from. Hello year-long grounding. FML

#21116600
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30643) - you deserved it (38504)

On 04/18/2014 at 6:56pm - misc - by say no to dick (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I realized that the only female who shows any sexual interest in me at all is my 70-year-old neighbor. FML

#21113897
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40438) - you deserved it (4232)

On 04/15/2014 at 5:55pm - love - by gerontofuck (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend yelled, "STUFF ME LIKE A TURKEY!" I couldn't finish. FML

#21112870
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55978) - you deserved it (7048)

On 04/14/2014 at 4:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was taking the biggest shit of my life. When I worked the thing out, it hit the water with such force that I got a toilet water enema from the backwash. I was so freaked out that I screamed and fell off the seat, prompting my husband to rush in to see what was wrong. FML

#21111156
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36068) - you deserved it (8460)

On 04/12/2014 at 2:07pm - misc - by traumatized (woman) - United States (New York)



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