iLoveUnionJ

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iLoveUnionJ

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 6 April 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 1931
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About iLoveUnionJ : Yeah. Hi.

iLoveUnionJ's page activity

Visits<b>sh4rpestl1ves</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 2:38pm<b>Meepsters</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 12:20pm<b>wellfme</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 7:23pm<b>elk21dbm</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 8:48pm

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iLoveUnionJ's favorite FMLs

Today, in public, one of my mom's friends asked me how on earth did I get so tall, my mom happily scampered to my side and shrieked: 'TWO YEARS OF BREAST MILK'. FML

by Ohgodmother / 02/28/2014 at 4:06am / Australia (Tasmania) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend met my parents. Within minutes, my dad managed to verbally sever his balls and reduce him to tears, "just for fun" apparently. FML

by Anonymous / 01/04/2014 at 6:13pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, my daughter and I were driving home when our truck broke down. A police officer stopped and offered to let me and my two year old sit in his car for the A/C. When we got in, I sat her on my lap, and she pulled down my tank top and screamed "Boobies!" right in front of the officer. FML

by embarrassedmom / 08/31/2013 at 7:48pm / United States / Kids

Today, I finally accepted my grandma's friend request on Facebook. I commented on a family photo album she'd uploaded, joking that the quality would greatly improve once she added pictures of me. My comment was met with, "Shut up you sewage rat". FML

by sweetnan / 08/27/2013 at 9:29pm / Chile (Region Metropolitana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized the moans I make when masturbating sound like I'm crying. I realized this when my neighbor pounded on the door asking if I was okay. FML

by crier / 08/27/2013 at 2:34pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I had a group presentation. I kept zipping my jacket up and down nervously. As I waited for my turn, I realized a bunch of classmates staring at me. I forgot that in the morning rush, I only put on a jacket. I only had a bra on underneath. FML

by xxSecretAngelxx / 08/19/2013 at 2:35pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for years. There was just one problem: it was so terrible I said, "I think I might be straight" about five minutes in just so it would stop. FML

by Anonymous / 08/18/2013 at 11:56pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, my sister had an emotional breakdown because two guys love her and she can't pick just one. Meanwhile I'm single and spend my time laying treats on my floor in a pattern and watching my rabbit run in circles. FML

by Having a pretty sister sucks. / 08/18/2013 at 9:36pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old standing over me with a pillow. I asked him what he was doing, and he replied that he and Steve were playing a game, but Steve said I have to be asleep for it. Steve is my son's imaginary friend. I'm convinced Steve wants to kill me. FML

by DrtySnchez / 08/18/2013 at 5:37am / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, we were having a family dinner with my boyfriend's parents and mine. In the kitchen, when we were getting the food ready, he proposed. I screamed. My dad thought he was hurting me, came in and tased him in the leg. FML

by why / 08/17/2013 at 10:18am / United States (Tennessee) / Love

Today, my 7-year-old son proudly announced that he had laid an egg during the night. I checked. He'd simply shat the bed. FML

by Anonymous / 08/13/2013 at 4:49am / Kids

Today, to help with my insomnia, I downloaded some relaxing rain MP3s and set them to loop. For the first time in ages, I fell asleep within minutes. Somewhere around 5, however, the sound of trickling water caused my bladder to empty itself all over my bed. FML

by just about pissed off / 08/11/2013 at 1:24pm / Egypt (Al Qahirah) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned that my wife used to strip while in college. I found this out when I brought her to a work party and my boss recognized her. FML

by Anonymous / 07/24/2013 at 3:33am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, it was so hot in the un-airconditioned gym that when I got up off the floor, I slipped in my own pool of sweat and got a concussion. FML

by not_very_smart / 07/24/2013 at 2:44am / United States / Health

Today, I sold ice cream to a group of kids. One of them looked sad, because he was the only one who couldn't buy any, so I gave him some for free. Apparently, he was allergic to something in it, and ended up being rushed to the hospital. FML

by Snarty / 07/23/2013 at 2:28pm / United States / Work