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iGiveNoDamn

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iGiveNoDamn
  • Town/Country : Johannesburg, South Africa
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 23 May 1985 (28 years)
  • Number of visits : 762
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About iGiveNoDamn : Who cares?!!!

iGiveNoDamn's last visitors

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iGiveNoDamn's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of iGiveNoDamn's badges

iGiveNoDamn's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend finally succeeded in unhooking my bra with one hand, excitedly exclaiming, "Boobies be free!" FML

#21043704
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40439) - you deserved it (10149)

On 01/29/2014 at 12:13am - love - by freed - United States (Ohio)

Today, I realized that my dog has more work experience than I do. He's a retired military working dog, and I have a Master's degree. FML

#21042693
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37685) - you deserved it (4593)

On 01/28/2014 at 3:22am - animals - by Pooper scooper - Guam

Today, my mom walked into my room to talk to me. I was surprised because we don't talk much. I was left with a smile on my face after she left, until I realized she'd stolen all the candy on my desk while I wasn't looking. FML

#21041865
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39087) - you deserved it (4120)

On 01/27/2014 at 2:26pm - love - by love you too mommy - United States (New York)

Today, I came home from the army and explained to my family how tough it was there. Then, as I was walking away, I stubbed my toe on the couch, fell and cried. FML

#21036979
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40951) - you deserved it (13762)

On 01/23/2014 at 7:53am - misc - by MarBlu - United States

Today, my plans for having sex with my girlfriend were thwarted for the sixth time in a row by my own mother. I found out later that she's been reading my texts so she knew when to drop by and ruin everything. FML

#21035329
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44984) - you deserved it (8216)

On 01/21/2014 at 6:26pm - intimacy - by MM - United States (Maine)

Today, my friends and I went camping in the woods. I fell asleep first. Waking up hours later to them bunched up together in the middle of the tent and me half-way outside, I confronted them about it. They admitted, "We heard a bear so we needed a sacrifice." FML

#21020901
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46068) - you deserved it (4928)

On 01/07/2014 at 11:37pm - misc - by bear food - United States (California)

Today, I realised after showering that I didn't have a towel, so I thought I would risk a naked dash to my brother's room to steal one of his. He and his friend were in the room and both agreed that I needed a "trim". FML

#21019082
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45751) - you deserved it (18834)

On 01/06/2014 at 1:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - South Africa

Today, I was at a basketball game. Sitting in the bleachers, I looked over at my friend and said, "Number 33 has a really cute butt." The man in front of us turned around, looked me dead in the eye, and said, "Thanks." Number 33's dad was a very proud father. FML

#21017330
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44863) - you deserved it (11663)

On 01/05/2014 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, my daughter started speaking with hashtags. I told her to knock it off, to which she replied, "You don't get it, mom - hashtag white girl probs." Hashtag FML

#21016204
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48266) - you deserved it (5043)

On 01/04/2014 at 1:06am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML

Today, I dropped my suitcase on my toe. Don't worry, it was already broken. FML

#21010276
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38476) - you deserved it (3375)

On 12/30/2013 at 8:07am - health - by laurenasabutton (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, me and some friends had home-made burgers for lunch. The guy who did the cooking later insisted that spitting in a frying pan is a perfectly acceptable way of guessing the right time to add the oil. FML

#21009569
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35036) - you deserved it (3031)

On 12/29/2013 at 6:28pm - health - by HungerStrike (man) - Czech Republic (Stredocesky kraj)

Today, I went to my bedroom for some alone time while my daughter watched TV. I didn't realize that my iPad was still connected to the Apple TV, until I hit play on some porn and heard a scream from the other room. FML

#21008990
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23618) - you deserved it (49594)

On 12/29/2013 at 2:01am - kids - by ConfusedDad - United States

Today, I asked my husband to try a little foreplay for once, instead of just rushing into sex. His idea of foreplay was to sweetly whisper that he was going to "penis" me so hard. That's the first time I've heard the word "penis" used as a verb, and hopefully the last. FML

#21007475
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43559) - you deserved it (4930)

On 12/27/2013 at 5:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I was taking a shower with my boyfriend. While we were washing our hair, he got soap in his eyes and mouth. I was facing him, and since his eyes were closed he didn't realize how close I was. When he spat the soap out, it went straight into my eyes. Neither of us could see. FML

#20994581
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41509) - you deserved it (5809)

On 12/16/2013 at 11:44am - misc - by abc123 (woman) - United States (Washington)



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