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iFRUiTTART

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iFRUiTTART
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7647
  • Number of comments : 24
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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iFRUiTTART's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a neon themed party. Standing by the UV light, I looked down and realised my pad was glowing through my tights. FML

#3741117
347 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65015) - you deserved it (12781)

On 07/14/2009 at 8:23am - misc - by paddy (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I received an email with a link to a story about a man who lost 650 pounds. I ignored it, until I saw who sent it. My mom, with the message "Maybe there's hope for you." FML

#3740812
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37722) - you deserved it (7641)

On 07/14/2009 at 7:41am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my fiancé and I toured our dream home. I was so excited about it that I posted all kinds of pictures of it on Facebook. My Boss' daughter just called and said she loved my pictures so much she made an offer on the house. We were 1 week away from making an offer. FML

#3729868
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42252) - you deserved it (27168)

On 07/13/2009 at 10:16pm - money - by Homeless (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, while I was working as a waitress, I had to wait on a table of 13 people. I was struggling through it and when they finally left I went by the table to pick up my tip. Instead of a money I got a napkin saying "Here's your tip, don't be a waitress." FML

#3729416
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50826) - you deserved it (5979)

On 07/13/2009 at 10:04pm - work - by Nick (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I had to clean my walls with those Mr Clean Magic Sponges because we were having visitors. I got bored and started drawing penises with it because they would leave wet marks. There is nothing magic about how slow they dry when your visitors come an hour early. They saw all ten of them. FML

#3723567
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6980) - you deserved it (55344)

On 07/13/2009 at 6:18pm - misc - by iJehx (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I proposed to a girl I'd been in love with for 6 years. I filled the balcony of the building where I'd first laid eyes on her with innumerable roses and, under the starlit sky, I did it. She later posted on facebook 'OMG. This geek I knew from high school did the FUNNIEST thing today'. FML

#3720470
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52965) - you deserved it (27833)

On 07/13/2009 at 4:16pm - love - by JackOLantern (man) - Satellite Provider

Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend that I couldn't believe this happened he said, "I'm not going to lie, I didn't always pull out fast." FML

#3711192
377 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17716) - you deserved it (76998)

On 07/13/2009 at 5:17am - intimacy - by air (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, while eating a Subway sandwich, I was watching a comedian on TV. As he said his signature line, I laughed hysterically and accidentally snorted a jalapeño into my nose. I spent the next 5 minutes trying to snort out the little piece that got lodged into my nostril. FML

#3708472
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32550) - you deserved it (10749)

On 07/13/2009 at 2:17am - misc - by zombielover1 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to the mall and had to parallel park. It took me 10 to 12 minutes of maneuvering before I got into the slot. When I turned off the car and got out, there were 8 people laughing hysterically and clapping for me. FML

#3706736
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20409) - you deserved it (40090)

On 07/13/2009 at 1:14am - misc - by greek_dancer (woman) - United States

Today, I had gotten home from dropping my boyfriend off when my dad said "your phones been buzzing". I had a text saying "you're grounded," from my Dad. My Alarm saying 'Birth Control Pill' had been going off for a half hour while I was gone. FML

#3704342
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36185) - you deserved it (28135)

On 07/13/2009 at 12:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at a party at the house of the guy I really like. We were talking when he pulled me into his room. I was excited he was finally taking our friendship to the next level, until he handed me a stick of deodorant, saying "I didn't wanna tell you in the hallway, but you really need this." FML

#3698192
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35147) - you deserved it (14752)

On 07/12/2009 at 8:41pm - love - by Dee (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was at Target with my mom and we finished purchasing our items. We had gotten a fan so I said, "This thing is too big to fit in." First thing my mom yells? "THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!" and starts laughing hysterically in front of the entire store. FML

#3692539
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44209) - you deserved it (11184)

On 07/12/2009 at 2:25pm - misc - by embarrassed (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was on my girlfriend's computer. When searching on google, her browsing history popped up. The first thing was "Best positions for a small penis." FML

#3691268
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79553) - you deserved it (11985)

On 07/12/2009 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by wtf (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend threw me on the couch as I walked in the door. I butt dialed my mom in the process. My girlfriend took off my pants and we got to business. After about 30 seconds of hearing what was going on, my mom thought something was wrong and called the cops to my apartment. FML

#3669335
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43849) - you deserved it (7512)

On 07/11/2009 at 3:38pm - intimacy - by policeopenup (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I received 7 notifications on facebook. Girls in my grade were commenting on my photo because they knew the location of it. They then started to have a conversation and they planned a whole social event. On my photo. I wasn't invited. FML

#3669068
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44876) - you deserved it (3775)

On 07/11/2009 at 3:27pm - misc - by laurraaa (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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