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iBurnTrees

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iBurnTrees
  • Town/Country : Greenwood, United States of Emerica
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 11 January 1991 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 313
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About iBurnTrees : My cat isn't dead, that's how he sleeps =^_^=
i drive a 2004 GTO, sell cats on the black market and own the globe trotters. Psh, and you thought you were a boss...

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It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

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Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

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iBurnTrees's favorite FMLs

Today, while casually sitting at a bar, a drunk biker with no teeth leaned over and tried to kiss me. I'm a sailor in the Navy, but I think I screamed like a little girl. FML

#12617808
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24548) - you deserved it (3593)

On 08/19/2010 at 1:16am - misc - by dentallycorrect - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got bitch-slapped by a walrus at Sea Life Park. FML

#11841759
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31647) - you deserved it (7551)

On 07/13/2010 at 12:34am - misc - by Betchsadface - United States

Today, I realized that not only am I still an unpublished author, but I can't even get an FML posted after submitting several in the last year. FML

#9042400
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25915) - you deserved it (5129)

On 03/13/2010 at 8:43am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I slipped on my icy front porch, fell back and hit my head on the step. I tried to get up, but lost my balance and fell halfway into the bush next to the steps. I then looked up to see my very hot, British, Ex-Special Forces next door neighbor laughing so hard he dropped his snow shovel. FML

#7757731
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17540) - you deserved it (2284)

On 01/31/2010 at 9:12pm - misc - by youlyingjerk (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was walking down the street in downtown Charleston where there are a lot of horse-drawn carriage tours and I decided to pick up some litter. Some of it was in a puddle of water, but after I picked up the trash, I realized the puddle was horse urine. FML

#5953331
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17535) - you deserved it (6543)

On 10/23/2009 at 12:22am - animals - by Leash (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my fiancé and I met his mother for lunch to discuss wedding plans. When we got there, I went to the bathroom to wash my hands. I heard a woman talking on her cell phone in the stall about her son's "disgusting, slutty girlfriend." The toilet flushed and my future mother-in-law walked out. FML

#5940105
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33142) - you deserved it (2269)

On 10/22/2009 at 1:53am - love - by uneek_3225 (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was stopped by a cop while walking down the street. He was slowly trailing me before pulling along side of me and asking how my night was going. He then said, "You know I can't let you do this. Know those new jeans you bought? The sticker is still on the leg" and drove off. FML

#5677989
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7333) - you deserved it (23678)

On 10/06/2009 at 3:12am - misc - by limecat (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my whole family was sitting in the kitchen. My sister was stoned and passed out in our dog's bed. My dad was drunk, yelling "who's your daddy" at his plate of barbecue, and my mom just sat there with that, "what the hell happened to my life" look on her face. FML

#5224172
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53001) - you deserved it (2691)

On 09/13/2009 at 5:27am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was visiting my friends new house and he was showing me around. I saw a small door in the wall and decided to open it. When I opened it, his daughter was hiding in there and screamed to scare me. Now I know my scream is more high pitched than his daughters. I'm a 37 year old male. FML

#3188725
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25007) - you deserved it (5003)

On 06/24/2009 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to the store to buy groceries. I didn't care how I looked, so I wore an old shirt that said, "Thousands of my potential children died on your daughter's face last night." I ran into my girlfriend's parents at the store. FML

#2244608
449 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33735) - you deserved it (109110)

On 05/24/2009 at 3:50pm - misc - by helloitsbrian6969 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got back my math test. Instead of taking the time to mark the mistakes, my professor just circled the bottom half of the page and wrote "OMG." FML

#853708
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79993) - you deserved it (21095)

On 04/07/2009 at 2:37pm - work - by aviators (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I realized that instead of actually trying to get a job, save money, lose weight, and get thin so I could maybe attempt to date again; I'd rather spend my money on a Fleshlight. FML

#1321
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6361) - you deserved it (26143)

On 01/16/2009 at 3:34am - intimacy - by horny bastard - United States (Minnesota)

Today, it's been 2 weeks since I lost my virginity and I've already had sex with 3 guys. I think I'm a nympho. FML

#723
13 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7981) - you deserved it (56889)

On 01/07/2009 at 3:16am - intimacy - by sexaddict - Sent from mobile version



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