It was probably your fault anyway.
MSN: hypoxxia@gmail.com
Today, at a family gathering, my aunt asked me when I was planning to have children. I'm only 16, I laughed and said not for a while, definitely not until I get married. My family shook their heads, and ignored me for the rest of the day. Apparently, teenage pregnancy is valued in my family. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40917) - you totally deserved it (1330)
On 08/15/2009 at 7:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, while I was watching Miley Cyrus' new music video, I had an itch near my bikini line that I couldn't reach through my jeans. So I unzipped my pants to get to it, and that's when my boyfriend walked in on me with my hands down my pants. He thought I was getting off on the music video. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30884) - you totally deserved it (13072)
On 08/15/2009 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by notguilty (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I found out my husband had bought my 1-year-old daughter a shirt that says "Birth Control Fail" in pink glittery letters. He even took her out in it while I was at work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35679) - you totally deserved it (3679)
On 08/14/2009 at 12:57pm - kids - by ohgod (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, I had to give a presentation about Adolf Hitler. I wanted to point out he was a very good speaker, and could incite a crowd. Instead, what came out was 'Hitler's oral skills made everyone go wild with excitement" FML
I agree, your life sucks (14482) - you totally deserved it (28548)
On 06/01/2009 at 7:12pm - misc - by Cail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
I agree, your life sucks (43790) - you totally deserved it (1742)
On 05/20/2009 at 4:49pm - misc - by lm (man) - Ireland (Dublin)
Today, I was at the mall with my girlfriend's family. Her 7 year old brother told me he was feeling sad, so I tried to give him a pat on the back, but it turns out he had a bruise there. He yelled out "don't touch me there!" In the middle of the mall. Now her parents think I'm a pedophile. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33636) - you totally deserved it (1906)
On 05/16/2009 at 4:39am - misc - by notacreep (man) - United States (West Virginia)
Today, I thought it would be funny to fart in my roommates mouth while he was asleep. I walked over to him and pulled my pyjamas down and let loose. To my surprise it was a very wet one and I accidently took a dump on his face, he woke up and beat me until I was bleeding. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14229) - you totally deserved it (222086)
On 04/18/2009 at 1:09am - health - by dumptaker (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my girlfriend left a message on my phone. It was just the sounds of her having sex with somebody. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27055) - you totally deserved it (862)
On 12/31/2008 at 6:41pm - intimacy - by - France (Nord-Pas-de-Calais)
Today, I was jerking off in the train washroom when the ticket inspector knocked at the door. I was nearly done so I didn't open right away. I didn't think he would have the key…I found myself face to face with him and three other passengers. The worst being I didn't have a ticket. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3394) - you totally deserved it (26752)
On 12/24/2008 at 3:40am - intimacy - by lip - France (Ile-de-France)
Today, at the Eurostar customs, an officer asked me if I had packed my luggage myself. I teasingly answered "No, I was helped by a member of Al Qaeda." which earned me a body and luggage search and a missed train. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1894) - you totally deserved it (20364)
On 12/14/2008 at 12:15am - misc - by Behemoth2 - France (Ile-de-France)
Today, I went to fill up my car. 500 metres before the petrol station, I saw a group of motorcyclists in my rear view mirror. I slowed down and pulled over to let them past. In fact, they were also going to fill up. 35 motorcyclists and 2 petrol pumps. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7102) - you totally deserved it (1847)
On 12/09/2008 at 2:01am - misc - by gui909 - France (Ile-de-France)
Today, in front of a hospital, I noticed that an old lady was having trouble lighting her cigarette because she had Parkison's. So I went to help her to light it up and she then started chatting with me and told me she had lung cancer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8632) - you totally deserved it (2085)
On 12/03/2008 at 1:11am - health - by Anto - France (Ile-de-France)
Today I sent a text message to my boyfriend: "Come over in an hour, I love you." An hour later, the doorbell rang. It was my ex, looking happy and still as taken with me as before, with a bunch of roses. I'd got the wrong number - my ex and my boyfriend have the same name. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4127) - you totally deserved it (13512)
On 12/01/2008 at 11:57pm - love - by eleonor - France (Ile-de-France)
Today, my girlfriend told me that I was irrationally jealous. I’ve just learnt that she has a website where she masturbates in front of a webcam. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28636) - you totally deserved it (1155)
On 12/01/2008 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Maestro - France (Ile-de-France)
Today whilst chatting with my mum on msn she unintentionally sends me an animated emoticon of a penis jerking off repeatedly. I don't even want to know the type of conversation she is having. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17307) - you totally deserved it (688)
On 11/23/2008 at 4:24am - intimacy - by Dina - France (Ile-de-France)
