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hsk007

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hsk007
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  • Number of visits : 34
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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hsk007's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm trapped in my apartment. My new cat won't let me leave. Every time I try, he blocks the door, hisses and tries to savage me. I'm my own cat's bitch. FML

#20864719
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43536) - you deserved it (18650)

On 09/02/2013 at 3:22pm - animals - by aherdofpigs - United States

Today, I did something I'd always wanted to do: I went swimming with dolphins. It was really fun, until I went to kiss the dolphin, and she slipped her tongue half into my mouth. FML

#20849713
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41072) - you deserved it (13190)

On 08/22/2013 at 6:45pm - animals - by violated ._. (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up to find pieces of a dead spider stuck in my braces. FML

#20423697
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46074) - you deserved it (3233)

On 12/26/2012 at 2:30pm - misc - by gaggin - United States (California)

Today, after a year of coaxing, I got my boyfriend of 18 months to agree to have sex with me. He decided his first course of action was to try to shove his flaccid penis into my unlubricated vagina. FML

#19319000
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24037) - you deserved it (6977)

On 03/21/2012 at 3:27am - intimacy - by ReallyBro (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I started a new medication, not paying much notice to the one side effect: "unusual vaginal secretions". They're unusual alright, they glued my underwear to my skin. FML

#18812557
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27138) - you deserved it (2762)

On 01/15/2012 at 4:00am - intimacy - by involuntary waxing - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML

#361047
1199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (617551) - you deserved it (414101)

On 03/15/2009 at 10:20pm - misc - by KAAALIS (woman) - United States (New York)



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