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hpsmith's FML badges
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Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
hpsmith's favorite FMLs
Today, my wife and I had a fight, which I thought we resolved. Later, while painting the kitchen, I told her to change into an old shirt she didn't care about. She made a huge show of putting her wedding gown on, veil and all. FML
by Anonymous / 01/01/2013 at 4:33pm / United States (Georgia) / Love
by Anonymous / 12/10/2012 at 3:41pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
Today, a nearby volcano erupted for the second time. We were all urged to keep our windows and doors closed in case of ash clouds. My father responded by opening every window and door and shouting, "Come at me, bro!" FML
by vanillatwilight2 / 11/20/2012 at 11:50pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous
Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML
by Targeted / 11/08/2012 at 11:54pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was handing candy to a little boy who was trick or treating by himself. He was small enough to grab the candy and run past me into my house. I've been searching my house for two hours and still can't find him. I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML
by ananymous / 10/31/2012 at 11:04pm / United States (New York) / Kids
by Anonymous / 10/05/2012 at 1:49am / United States / Work
by Anonymous / 10/04/2012 at 10:45pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
Today, my boss captured a huge spider and put it in a jar on the desk in our shop. He's named it Fluffy and is threatening to fire me if I harm it. I'm horribly arachnophobic and we share that desk. FML
by Anonymous / 10/04/2012 at 10:02pm / United States / Work
by imafunguy / 10/04/2012 at 8:28pm / United States / Love
by DCarreon / 10/04/2012 at 3:13am / United States (California) / Love
Today, a classmate came up to me, quickly shoved a dollar bill down my shirt, threw her arms around me and told me to pretend I was her boyfriend to avoid some other guy. Sad thing is, this is the first girl I've hugged in ages. FML
by nonfreehugs / 10/04/2012 at 1:09am / United States (Washington) / Love
by tehaustiebear / 10/03/2012 at 6:03pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/30/2012 at 12:37am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I started my new job. Less than one hour into the day, my boss told me that the reason he hired me was that I was the least attractive of everyone he interviewed, so I'd be less likely to cause a distraction. FML
by Annette / 09/22/2012 at 12:17pm / United States (Washington) / Work
by memphis201 / 07/26/2012 at 1:20pm / United States (Kentucky) / Health
- Today, my mother decided to share with me that my father is impotent, and they hadn't had sex in a… Today, my boyfriend texted me telling me how much he loved me, and that he wanted my virginity. We… Today, a police officer caught my girlfriend and me having sex. The officer was my dad, and we were…