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hpdrew15

Offline (the 11/23/2014 at 10:06am) | Search for a member

hpdrew15

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  • Number of visits : 3001
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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hpdrew15's page activity

Visits<b>Jamied123</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 11:12pm

hpdrew15's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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hpdrew15's favorite FMLs

Today, on our second date, the unemployed guy I'm seeing tried to convince me to open a joint bank account in our name. FML

#21299619
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32651) - you deserved it (4495)

On 11/15/2014 at 2:58pm - love - by back to cock-hunting (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, like any other day since that stupid movie Frozen came out, people have been asking me if I want to build a snowman, like they're the funniest people on the planet. My name is Elsa. FML

#21297408
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44019) - you deserved it (3845)

On 11/11/2014 at 11:34pm - work - by elsatheannoyed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend kept jiggling my fat rolls while we were cuddling. I was annoyed, and I told him he could at least go for my boobs instead. He instantly replied, "But these are bigger..." FML

#21293369
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34881) - you deserved it (7615)

On 11/06/2014 at 12:14pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boss told me to fire the unstable, former military, gun nut employee. He's been making death threats to his supervisors. FML

#21293180
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31763) - you deserved it (2470)

On 11/06/2014 at 1:53am - work - by HelpMe1 (man) - Indonesia (Jakarta Raya)

Today, my dad told me that my mom wanted to name me something "unusual." He eventually got her to compromise. I go by Violet. I now know that my legal name is Purple. FML

#21292947
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36395) - you deserved it (2407)

On 11/05/2014 at 8:12pm - misc - by Purple (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I managed to convince my sister that when you press down the diet button on the lid of a McDonald's cup it turns whatever is in there diet. I pressed the button and she started shouting how she hates diet drinks. She's 19. FML

#21292789
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28869) - you deserved it (3324)

On 11/05/2014 at 4:25pm - misc - by aineroo (woman) - Ireland (Galway)

Today, coming home, I opened up my door to find my drunk boyfriend trying to teach our three baby parakeets to perch on his erect penis. FML

#21278553
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35574) - you deserved it (3733)

On 10/15/2014 at 7:36pm - misc - by facepalm (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in the missionary position. Once again, our cat decided to crawl onto his back and stare at me. FML

#21276776
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33545) - you deserved it (4568)

On 10/13/2014 at 6:20am - intimacy - by Drafrica (woman) - South Africa

Today, my son drank a bottle of hot sauce. It wasn't a dare, he actually thought that it would give him a fever so that he could skip school tomorrow. This idiot is 15 years old. FML

#21276472
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35754) - you deserved it (4374)

On 10/12/2014 at 8:38pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I woke up to find that my acne has lined itself beautifully in a perfect 'L' shape in the centre of my forehead. FML

Today, I finally lost my virginity. Too bad it cost me every last shred of self-respect and involved begging a hooker to take my money. FML

#21275111
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32626) - you deserved it (19193)

On 10/10/2014 at 5:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML

Today, I overheard my brother telling his friend that having sex with a girl who's on the pill gives the guy female hormones and "turns you into like, half-chick, half-dude." He was serious. How am I related to this moron? FML

#21270200
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33173) - you deserved it (2443)

On 10/03/2014 at 4:43pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I found out I'm allergic to condoms. Which would be great if my girlfriend wasn't allergic to birth control. FML

#21270163
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43213) - you deserved it (3650)

On 10/03/2014 at 3:04pm - health - by oncehipjr (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my drunk husband came home, got into bed, and started humping the body pillow. He ended up whining about how I hadn't come yet, then angrily slurred that I must be cheating on him. All I could do was stay quiet and wonder how the idiot even made it home alive. FML

#21266933
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47345) - you deserved it (3523)

On 09/28/2014 at 11:30am - intimacy - by tw@ (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)



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