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horseman1421

Offline (the 10/18/2014 at 7:09am) | Search for a member

horseman1421

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horseman1421horseman1421
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 11 October 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 49
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About horseman1421 : I'm just a small town country boy who likes to look good. I love to hunt and fish. The best place to be is on my horse or by the fire with my friends

horseman1421's page activity

Visits<b>Larissa24</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 7:42pm<b>Bree06</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 12:20am<b>DomiLove</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 8:10pm<b>jodie_manuel</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 6:38pm

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horseman1421's favorite FMLs

Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML

Today, I was going for my morning walk, when a guy in a massive truck drove up beside me, with a kid no more than 4 riding shotgun. I lost my faith in humanity when his tiny voice yelled through the window, "Nice ass!" FML

#21257417
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40305) - you deserved it (4412)

On 09/13/2014 at 10:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, I bought some noise-canceling headphones. They work well. Too well. My mom came home, unpacked her shopping, walked upstairs, knocked on my door, opened my door, and found me jacking off to a porno, all without me hearing a thing. Fucking hell. FML

#21246585
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36480) - you deserved it (35439)

On 08/27/2014 at 5:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, as I got out the shower, my mom walked in to give me a towel, then quickly covered her eyes and said, "Woah, I almost saw your penis. Good things it's ridiculously small." I had friends over, and I'm pretty sure I'll hear about this for at least the next month. FML

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50616) - you deserved it (9734)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, I was watching the movie Frozen with my 8 year old daughter. I had seen it before, so I sung along with some of the songs. My daughter put a finger over my lips, said "Shhhhhhhhut the fuck up," then turned back to the TV, giggling. FML

#21245090
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36627) - you deserved it (13757)

On 08/25/2014 at 2:05pm - kids - by JackieD (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my girlfriend sent me a bunch of sexy pics and said to come over to her place. I thought she was in the mood for sex. Nope, she just wanted me to come over and hang a shelf, after which she sent me back home. FML

#21244207
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39286) - you deserved it (5859)

On 08/24/2014 at 1:51am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45735) - you deserved it (7611)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when we heard a screech. My two cats were having it harder than us. FML

#21241441
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42700) - you deserved it (5463)

On 08/20/2014 at 2:07am - intimacy - by Mia (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my new doctor gave me a breast exam and said everything was healthy, before adding "Well, I think so, anyway. I don't actually work here." As I freaked out, he laughed out loud, said he was just kidding, and that he should prescribe me a chill pill. FML

#21241090
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42071) - you deserved it (5967)

On 08/19/2014 at 4:46pm - health - by humdrummitydrum (woman) - United States

Today, I went to a baseball game with my girlfriend's dad. I got a boner when they sang the anthem, because that's what I sing in my head when having sex with his daughter so I last longer. FML

#21240482
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44015) - you deserved it (16400)

On 08/18/2014 at 12:39pm - intimacy - by embarrassed - United States (New York)

Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML

#21239517
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42385) - you deserved it (13754)

On 08/17/2014 at 2:15am - kids - by you ripped them off ages ago (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, while I was at the dentist, I couldn't stop gagging when he tried to put a tab in my mouth to get an x-ray. As I left, I overheard him saying, "I feel sorry for her boyfriend." FML

#21238932
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48624) - you deserved it (7748)

On 08/16/2014 at 12:03pm - intimacy - by gag reflex - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out my girlfriend has been cheating on me. When I told my sister, she just smiled, held up a closed fist, and said "Look at the number of fucks I give!" She then raised a finger, said "Oops. Finger spasm!" then lowered it again. FML

#21238375
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44310) - you deserved it (4583)

On 08/15/2014 at 6:09pm - love - by meltdowninrels (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)



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