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Today, me and my family watched the video of my birth. In the video, when my mother sees me for the first time, she says "God he's ugly!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (20840) - you deserved it (1260)
On 01/21/2009 at 1:02am - misc - by mat - Sent from mobile version
Today, the girl I've had a crush on decided she wanted to see a movie with me. I tried to hold her hand during the movie and it was great for about 4 minutes. Then she said "Can I have my hand back?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (13682) - you deserved it (1920)
On 01/18/2009 at 7:12am - love - by vargasm - United States (New York)
Today, my mom asked me for advice on how to give a good blow job. I'm a guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26562) - you deserved it (1572)
On 01/16/2009 at 3:46pm - intimacy - by Ohai - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, my boyfriend struck up a conversation about the reproductive systems of seahorses. We were getting intimate at the time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15995) - you deserved it (1428)
On 01/16/2009 at 12:31pm - love - by Noname - United Kingdom
Today, while waiting for class, I let out a huge fart in front of everyone thinking no one would hear it over the music. I was wearing headphones. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5076) - you deserved it (21823)
On 01/16/2009 at 9:36am - misc - by Gob - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was eating at a nice restaurant. Feeling curious, I daringly asked for the surprise "Maiden's Dream" dessert. The waiter came back with a banana between two balls of ice-cream on a plate, and no spoon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13104) - you deserved it (4911)
On 01/03/2009 at 3:38am - misc - by sm@rtie - Sent from mobile version
Today, I dressed in my sexiest clothes to meet my new boyfriend at a restaurant. As I was a bit early, I took the opportunity to smoke a cigarette outside while I waited. The restaurant owner came out and said, "Hey, you. Go and 'work' somewhere else, please." FML
I agree, your life sucks (14746) - you deserved it (10054)
On 12/26/2008 at 1:32am - misc - by Lola - Sent from mobile version
Today, Father Christmas touched my ass in a shopping mall. I'm a bit worried about what's going to happen on Christmas Day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12539) - you deserved it (1256)
On 12/21/2008 at 12:04am - misc - by Loola - Sent from mobile version
Today, Father Christmas touched my ass in a shopping mall. I'm a bit worried about what's going to happen on Christmas Day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12539) - you deserved it (1256)
On 12/21/2008 at 12:04am - misc - by Loola - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was at a restaurant with a girl I like, and as I was getting my wallet out, I dropped a condom. She didn't see anything, and I didn't dare pick it up in case I drew attention to the "object". The waiter walked past, picked up, and held it out to me with a huge grin. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22976) - you deserved it (6020)
On 11/18/2008 at 2:36am - love - by Otherguy - Sent from mobile version
Today, I farted A LOT during my exam, all silent so I figured I should be OK. Then I looked around and everybody was suffocating and giving me sly looks. I am now known to everyone in the department as SuperFart. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11856) - you deserved it (28360)
On 10/27/2008 at 8:13pm - misc - by Hth - United States (Delaware)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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