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hornytoad13

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hornytoad13

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 10 March 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 67
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 3 posted

About hornytoad13 : College student just trying to make a living off of bad jokes.

hornytoad13's page activity

Visits<b>Risea</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 1:52am<b>stuckintime</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 6:34pm<b>epeeftw</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 6:51am<b>Marcella1016</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 5:44am<b>magicviper1</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 10:44pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 7:41pm<b>EnigmaticSoul</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 7:13pm<b>chaseafterwind82</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 2:06am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 7:53am<b>Mightytall</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 1:55am

Fucked!<b>chaseafterwind82</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 8:00am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 1:53pm

hornytoad13's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

One ring to rule them all

You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.

See all of hornytoad13's badges

hornytoad13's favorite FMLs

Today, I visited my boyfriend's uncle's house for a party. His 8 year old cousin started asking if I like penis, so my reaction was to laugh, spitting my drink on her and her new dress. She can't pronounce peanuts, and I can't visit anymore. FML

#21510516
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20431) - you deserved it (3462)

On 01/02/2016 at 3:25am - kids - by me - United States (Louisiana)

Today, while trying to explain to my friends what an anxiety attack is like, I had an anxiety attack. FML

#21502281
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21516) - you deserved it (2000)

On 12/10/2015 at 2:49pm - health - by ohtheirony - United States (Nevada)

Today, it's been two weeks since I got married. It's also two weeks since my husband got cold feet about moving in together, because he thinks the sudden change would be too emotionally distressing for his cat. FML

#21495373
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24856) - you deserved it (2854)

On 11/22/2015 at 1:10am - love - by unimpressed bride (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was peeing at a urinal, when the man next to me finished up and shook his penis. I got splashed. FML

#21472645
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24832) - you deserved it (1635)

On 09/25/2015 at 5:04pm - misc - by itwaswarm - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend went to work instead of going to my father's funeral. He works at home and chooses his own hours. FML

#21308437
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36671) - you deserved it (3264)

On 11/29/2014 at 11:29pm - misc - by .... - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was woken up by my wife softly kissing me on the lips. Half asleep, I kissed her back, before quickly opening my eyes and realising it wasn't my wife; it was my dog. FML

#21246644
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39029) - you deserved it (7232)

On 08/27/2014 at 7:04pm - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my husband came clean to having an affair with my sister. I later found out my other sister encouraged the affair because she thought they'd be a cute couple. FML

#21194001
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58654) - you deserved it (4233)

On 06/30/2014 at 5:06pm - love - by outoflove (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I saw the girl that I've had a crush on forever riding her horse on the side of the road. She waved, and without thinking, I honked my horn in response. Her horse bucked her off. FML

#19997037
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25070) - you deserved it (16801)

On 08/01/2012 at 7:31pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I leave Ireland after a 5 month study abroad. Today also happens to be the day that the price of alcohol decreases by 30%, the dollar increases by 15% and the girl I have been chasing the whole time, to no avail, finally decides to show an interest in me. FML

#6786909
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42016) - you deserved it (2893)

On 12/17/2009 at 12:00am - money - by exchange (man) - Ireland (Limerick)

Today, I had my first kiss standing in front of my front door. It was really cute, the way you normally think about first kisses. When I got inside, I realized my mom had been watching out her second story bedroom window taking pictures. She put them on Facebook captioned 'My baby's first kiss!' FML

#3302714
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (98442) - you deserved it (7092)

On 06/28/2009 at 11:53am - misc - by steven (man) - Cayman Islands



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