Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

hopper5101

Offline (the 08/20/2014 at 5:33pm) | Search for a member

hopper5101

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3347
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About hopper5101 : Criminal justice major at the best college ever :) SNHU class of 2017 :D

hopper5101's page activity

Visits<b>oloy</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 1:11am<b>k_gils</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 3:06pm<b>DWolf58</b> - the 12/24/2013 at 2:34pm<b>excrations</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 12:46pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 11/08/2013 at 7:28pm<b>CAMAR0kid93</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 2:27pm<b>jmcgee17</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 9:59am<b>jusgotburned</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 11:11pm<b>mariepastyglue</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 12:51pm<b>daisylovesyew16</b> - the 06/07/2013 at 1:28pm<b>RevengeIsSweet</b> - the 12/29/2012 at 5:27pm<b>TheWetzel</b> - the 12/17/2012 at 8:26pm<b>talun</b> - the 07/03/2010 at 11:16am

hopper5101's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of hopper5101's badges

hopper5101's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom found my pack of cigarettes. She's now making me go to rehab. I had only smoked one cigarette ever just to try it. I didn't even like it. FML

#12023644
316 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17203) - you deserved it (42120)

On 07/21/2010 at 12:08pm - misc - by Goody2shoes (man) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, my mother continued her lifelong habit of talking to anyone who isn't white in extremely slow, exaggerated "caveman" English. She insists that she isn't being racist, but rather is helping. FML

#12006480
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42223) - you deserved it (4205)

On 07/20/2010 at 5:17pm - misc - by notmuchfun - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found my lost iPhone earbuds. In the cat litter box. I am 100% sure that they passed through my cat to get there. FML

#12002480
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29601) - you deserved it (4252)

On 07/20/2010 at 12:34pm - animals - by brentkd - United States

Today, I found out my parents are getting divorced. They're fighting over the dog instead of my sister and me. FML

#12002440
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41689) - you deserved it (3491)

On 07/20/2010 at 12:29pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, while driving through town, I was distracted by a pretty girl walking on the nearby pavement and accidentally rear-ended the car in front of me. Not only did the pretty girl witness the crash and give a statement, it turned out she was a very feminine man. FML

#11999440
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12586) - you deserved it (43863)

On 07/20/2010 at 6:12am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, as I was buying carrots, a little red light started flashing and an alarm sounded. Curious, I looked up, only to get sprayed in the face by a sprinkler for the produce section of the store. FML

#11991356
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22070) - you deserved it (8596)

On 07/19/2010 at 10:06pm - misc - by PrintMaster - United States

Today, I met my biological mother for the first time. She stole my wallet. FML

#11989675
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59414) - you deserved it (3640)

On 07/19/2010 at 8:23pm - misc - by thanksmom (woman) - United States

Today, I was helping my friend create an online dating profile. When she got her search results, her #1 match was a blonde guy only 10 miles from her. His description: genuine, laid back, and ready for fun. He left off something kind of important. He's already married. To me. FML

#11983627
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (97999) - you deserved it (5652)

On 07/19/2010 at 1:36pm - love - by betrayed (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my kids surprised me when I got home. One of them played the Rocky theme song on the stereo, and the other came up to me and said, "Daddy, let's go. We need you to drop about 15 pounds before you appear in front of all of our friends at our play." FML

#11980877
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28343) - you deserved it (7341)

On 07/19/2010 at 9:59am - kids - by Cody (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while working at the bar, I was having a flawless night. Every pour was perfect, every shot expertly measured. I saw my manager for the first time that night, turned to greet him, and knocked over a tray of 30 or so glasses. Two remained unbroken. FML

#11945611
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32016) - you deserved it (4769)

On 07/17/2010 at 4:51pm - work - by barman - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was looking for a parking spot and finally found one. Trying to figure out if the spot was legal, I asked a cop that had pulled up. He said it was fine. I came back 3 hours later to a parking ticket. FML

#11945278
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37438) - you deserved it (3502)

On 07/17/2010 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, the airport security guard told me to lift my fat rolls so he could finish patting me down. FML

#11935766
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22096) - you deserved it (42870)

On 07/17/2010 at 2:16am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out I've been incorrectly sorting thousands of papers for the past two weeks. My boss wanted them sorted by date, but the co-worker who instructed me said to sort them into alphabetical order just to watch me fail. FML

#11927489
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35048) - you deserved it (2917)

On 07/16/2010 at 7:48pm - work - by MSURebel70 (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I learned that my mom's laptop was originally my Christmas gift. She opened it and decided she liked it so much she should have it. I got hot rollers. FML

#11927382
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32825) - you deserved it (2269)

On 07/16/2010 at 7:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my 23-year old boyfriend is not talking to me because I bought the regular kind of macaroni and cheese instead of the cartoon kind. FML

#11923673
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32798) - you deserved it (16831)

On 07/16/2010 at 3:45pm - misc - by liz - United States (California)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: