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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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hopiee

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hopiee
  • Town/Country : yo' chile ring
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 8 December 1994 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 51100
  • Number of comments : 34
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About hopiee : whatacunt
Aim - p00pinmyeye
Msn - hopieex3@hotmail.com

hopiee's last visitors

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hopiee's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

hopiee's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my parents that I wanted a little brother. My dad apparently thought it would be funny to tell me that my mom just swallowed my little brother. FML

#13823528 (239)

I agree, your life sucks (42784) - you deserved it (5966)

On 11/13/2010 at 2:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while at dinner, I told my boyfriend that I wished he liked sushi. He replied, 'I wish you liked anal.' FML

#13814299 (266)

I agree, your life sucks (14796) - you deserved it (26256)

On 11/12/2010 at 11:31am - intimacy - by lisacasabonita (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I realized the nicest thing my fiance has said to me all month was that I have "very suckable titties." FML

#13806483 (119)

I agree, your life sucks (18195) - you deserved it (3762)

On 11/11/2010 at 8:48pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time. He got on the bed on all fours and crawled towards me, saying "My precious... my precious" in Gollum's voice. FML

#13782516 (228)

I agree, your life sucks (30035) - you deserved it (5123)

On 11/09/2010 at 9:10pm - intimacy - by single (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was eating at a Mexican restaurant with my sister. I was happily biting into a burrito, when I saw a man in his car in the restaurant parking lot, staring at us and jacking off. FML

#13774014 (205)

I agree, your life sucks (26518) - you deserved it (2441)

On 11/09/2010 at 2:51am - intimacy - by secretdoll (woman) - United States (California)

Today, trying to be cute, I told my soon-to-be husband he was the ying to my yang. He responded with "Baby, you're the Monica Lewinsky to my Bill Clinton." FML

#13762058 (138)

I agree, your life sucks (15614) - you deserved it (5684)

On 11/08/2010 at 4:50am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, a girl I like came over to my house because I'd promised to help her prepare for a maths test. My mom thought it would be funny to put a stack of porn magazines and handcuffs on the table in my room when I went to open the door. FML

#13673921 (159)

I agree, your life sucks (24711) - you deserved it (2752)

On 11/01/2010 at 11:10am - intimacy - by crazy_mom (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have sex for the first time. While we were undressing each other, he said, "Wow, if we have children, you're gonna have to shave, or they'll die from rug-burn as they come out!" FML

#13654098 (256)

I agree, your life sucks (26387) - you deserved it (19246)

On 10/30/2010 at 8:37pm - intimacy - by tht1chk - United States (California)

Today, I found dried cum in my hair - after being at work for two hours. FML

#13572879 (265)

I agree, your life sucks (9552) - you deserved it (29603)

On 10/24/2010 at 3:31am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I told my dad that I had a herpes infection. He said "Good." FML

#13495113 (135)

I agree, your life sucks (11308) - you deserved it (22521)

On 10/18/2010 at 2:36am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur.' FML

#13493485 (198)

I agree, your life sucks (7970) - you deserved it (23997)

On 10/18/2010 at 12:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I saw my boyfriend shaving his pubic hair before we had sex. This would be fine, except he was saying "Nom nom nom, I eat cock hairs" to his electric razor. FML

#13481200 (293)

I agree, your life sucks (29811) - you deserved it (6024)

On 10/17/2010 at 1:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML

#13432324 (342)

I agree, your life sucks (26946) - you deserved it (15287)

On 10/13/2010 at 9:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Asturias)

Today, my boyfriend used my love handles as ACTUAL love handles. FML

#13431073 (168)

I agree, your life sucks (15157) - you deserved it (12892)

On 10/13/2010 at 4:36am - intimacy - by Abused (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I learned that my boyfriend has narcolepsy when we were having sex and he passed out on top of me. FML

#13415492 (114)

I agree, your life sucks (18919) - you deserved it (2528)

On 10/12/2010 at 1:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)