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hopestanfield10

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hopestanfield10
  • Town/Country : Florence, USA
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Monday 4 September 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 17
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About hopestanfield10 : me

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hopestanfield10's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Just as he was about to finish, he pulled out and came in his hand. He then flicked his hand towards my face and yelled, "Sha-ZAM!" FML

#20999459
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49346) - you deserved it (7364)

On 12/20/2013 at 6:36pm - intimacy - by zamwow (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my grandma added to my elephant collection by giving me some underwear with elephant ears on the hips, and a long, sock-like nose. She has no idea they're meant for a guy. FML

#20989013
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46207) - you deserved it (4409)

On 12/11/2013 at 3:14pm - intimacy - by ElephantLover (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend when all of a sudden he stops, grabs my breasts with both hands, makes circular motions with them, and yells, "Daniel-san! Wax on! Wax off! Wax on! Wax off!", killing my orgasm dead. FML

#20981063
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39946) - you deserved it (4264)

On 12/04/2013 at 10:19pm - intimacy - by KarateKid76 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I learned that no matter how much of a nerd a girl claims to be, she is not ready for you to speak Klingon during sex. FML

#20963971
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23562) - you deserved it (60301)

On 11/19/2013 at 10:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my weird neighbor is a conspiracy theorist and thinks the government is trying to kill him. Someone thought it would be funny to shine a red laser light through his window. I was on the stairs when he ran past, screaming bloody murder, sending me down a flight of steps. FML

#20919796
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40165) - you deserved it (2907)

On 10/14/2013 at 3:13am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, a customer called me "chink eyes", "dog eater", "bloody Chinese communist" and "ching chong." I'm black. FML

#20919376
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51069) - you deserved it (3197)

On 10/13/2013 at 9:14pm - work - by mustabeendrugs (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, a week after my dad discovered Family Guy and started mindlessly repeating catchphrases from it 24/7, I finally lost my temper and told him how incredibly annoying it is. He just paused, turned to look me in the eyes, and said, "Shut up, Meg." FML

#20870528
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48716) - you deserved it (17338)

On 09/06/2013 at 6:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my 17-year-old son hacked off the legs of his bed with a saw. His explanation? "The bed looks cooler closer to the floor." FML

#20870098
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35770) - you deserved it (4267) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/06/2013 at 7:56am - kids - by Anonyme - France (Basse-Normandie)

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. When she went to give me a blow job, I got embarrassed and told her I'd rather just please her instead. Now she thinks she's inadequate and I'm being a jerk. FML

#20132312
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16329) - you deserved it (10824)

On 10/25/2012 at 1:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. Right as she orgasmed, she screamed out Megatron's name. When I later confronted her about this, she said that she always had a crush on him and wanted to be queen of the Decepticons. I've been dating this lunatic for a year and half now. FML

#20056354
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17090) - you deserved it (22235)

On 09/03/2012 at 9:02pm - intimacy - by Loserbot (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my pet fish died because my drunk father microwaved it. FML

#17362826
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41886) - you deserved it (2788)

On 08/04/2011 at 1:44am - animals - by SydIsPrettyCool - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went into a haunted house. Around 30 seconds into the adventure, I couldn't stop screaming at the top of my lungs from all of the scares. Suddenly, the little girl ahead of me, who was all by herself, turned around and told me to "suck it up and grow a pair, loser." FML

#13678660
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7947) - you deserved it (33365)

On 11/01/2010 at 7:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I was watching a movie at my girlfriend's house with her and her parents. There was a part where a brother and sister kissed, so I said "where'd they come from, Alabama?" Today is also the day I found out my girlfriend's parents are from Alabama. FML

#10717773
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10433) - you deserved it (32278)

On 05/23/2010 at 7:15pm - misc - by THANKS4theINFO (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my husband and I were role playing to keep our marriage alive. His character was a deranged stalker while I was the helpless girl. My neighbor thought I was really being chased so she called the cops. Once they came we explained the whole story and got a fine for disturbing the peace. FML

#8193148
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13860) - you deserved it (5677)

On 02/13/2010 at 1:51am - intimacy - by whathef???? - Canada (British Columbia)



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